


Simple as 1 2 3

by PinkGerberDaisies



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Childhood Friends, Eventual Smut, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Hockey, Jealousy, Misunderstandings, Slow Burn, UST
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-29
Updated: 2018-06-08
Packaged: 2019-05-15 04:03:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 29,863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14783258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PinkGerberDaisies/pseuds/PinkGerberDaisies
Summary: Tessa Virtue is ready to start her freshman year at the University of Toronto. She's thought of everything - the textbooks, the courses, where to live, memorized the campus map. She definitely has NOT thought about the star of the school's hockey team who used to be her best friend.An AU where Scott chose hockey and the two ex-best friends reunite in college after a misunderstanding broke them apart.





	1. Chapter 1

**Simple as 1 2 3**

 

_It's as simple as a girl in a corner_

_1 2 3_

_It's as simple as a boy in a corner_

_When he wants the same thing_

_It's as simple as walking over_

_And saying something quick_

_Before the chance is over_

_Here you go - 1 2 3_

 

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title comes from the song by Jukebox the Ghost.
> 
> I blame the picture for getting the idea in my head.


	2. Chapter 1: Jumpstarted

              “Are you sure that’s everything?”

              “Yes, Mom.” Tessa rolled her eyes as she answered the same question for what felt like the millionth time.

              “Nothing left at home or in the car?” Her mother, Kate, was scanning the simple dorm room – checking for any sign that her daughter was unprepared or lacking in any supplies for the upcoming school year.

              “I triple-checked both, and Dad said the car is empty. I’ve got it all.”

               “Alright. Well, don’t forget freshman orientation begins tomorrow. I know we toured the campus, but take a map just in case you get lost.”

               “I’ll be fine, Mom.” Tessa insisted affectionately. Honestly, with all her anxiety you’d think Kate was the one starting university, not Tessa.

               “I know you will honey.” Tessa found herself being pulled into a bone-crushing hug, short blonde hair smothering her face as her mother sniffled next to her ear. “Make sure you call every day.”

               Tessa returned the tight hug, even as she said, “ _Every_ day Mom? Really? You know Toronto isn’t that far from home, right?”

               Kate pulled back and wiped a tear from her eye. “I know, I know. I’m just going to miss you. My last baby leaving the nest.”

               “I’ll call. I promise.”

               With another tearful hug and a kiss on the cheek, the door closed – leaving Tessa alone in her new dorm room for the first time.

               She hadn’t been nervous all summer - instead anxiously awaiting the day that she would be out of her childhood home and entering the next stage of her life at the University of Toronto. She had a plan: study psychology and graduate at the top of her class before going for a Masters degree. She’d made lists and packed three times and bought just about a million mechanical pencils (in case she lost some or other students asked to borrow one and never gave it back. _So annoying_.) She’d poured over her course directory and carefully studied each syllabus. Memorized the campus map as well as taking a guided tour with her parents. No one could be more ready for this than her.

               But as she turned back to face her dorm room – a standard double at Chestnut Residence Hall – she suddenly felt overwhelmingly small and alone. This was it. No turning back. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, Tessa got to work. There was nothing like work to distract you from bad thoughts, and unpacking was the perfect distraction from the melancholy that threatened to overwhelm her.

               She had just finished laying out her white bedspread when the door opened and a stack of boxes fell through – tumbling to the ground with a spectacular crash.

               “Dammit!” A pretty blonde girl was revealed to be the source of the disaster, and Tessa ran over to help.

               “Here let me help you with those.” Bending down she started picking up the various items that had fallen out of the open top box. A copy of _Twilight,_ some make-up, and a _Welcome to the University of Toronto_ freshman guide. This must be her roommate.

                “Thank you. I’m such a klutz sometimes. My dad said not to try to take everything at once.” She shrugged helplessly, as if she’d had no choice but to try anyway. “I’m Kaitlyn by the way. Kaitlyn Weaver.”  She stuck out a perfectly manicured hand and Tessa took it.

                “Tessa Virtue. I guess we’re roommates this year.”

                "I guess we are!” She replied cheerily, lifting the boxes and taking them to her side of the room. “Where are you from?”

                “London. It’s a town a little ways from here. You?” Tessa sat down on the edge of her newly made bed, watching as Kaitlyn began throwing clothes from one of the boxes into her dresser.

                “Houston. In Texas. I just couldn’t stand the idea of going to an American university. It seemed so _boring_.”

                Tessa chuckled, and decided – with no small amount of relief – that she was going to like rooming with Kaitlyn. She seemed friendly and outgoing and nice, even if a little clumsy and unorganized.

                They went and got lunch in the student commissary and Tessa learned that Kaitlyn was majoring in Art and Art History, loved spicy food, and despised Orlando Bloom (“Don’t get me started, Tess. It’s a sordid history”).

 

 

                Freshman orientation was a lot less stressful than Tessa had anticipated. For one thing, she had Kaitlyn so it wasn’t lonely, and for another she’d already had the private campus tour. Which is how she found herself getting easily distracted instead of taking meticulous notes like she normally would as they walked around the various buildings.

                “And this is the Varsity Stadium and Arena, where our very own Varsity Blues hockey team plays. Make sure you get a chance to go to at least one game this season, as it’s sure to be a exciting.” A few of the other students on the tour whispered enthusiastically, but Tessa didn't share the sentiment. She liked hockey well enough, she supposed, but didn’t purposely seek it out. And she certainly wouldn’t be wasting precious study time on going to a game.

                “I’m so excited. I bought season tickets.” Kaitlyn whispered in her ear, so as not to bring down the wrath of the guide for interrupting.

                “Seriously? You like hockey?” Tessa had _not_ expected that from a girl from Texas.

                “I like hockey _players_.” Kaitlyn winked conspiratorially, “Honestly, the Varsity Blues has some attractive guys on the team, and it would be wrong of me not to show some school spirit, ya know?”  

                A flash of dark hazel eyes and unruly hair went through Tessa’s mind, but she quickly dismissed it. “Well, have fun. I won’t be going.”

                “Aw, Tess. You have to come to at least one game.” Kaitlyn pouted dramatically, eliciting a laugh from Tessa and a stern look from their tour guide.

                “My family’s been making me watch those games for years. I know exactly what I'll be missing - nothing.”

                Kaitlyn shrugged and looped an arm through hers. “We’ll see about that. I’m pretty good at getting what I want.”

                Tessa didn’t argue with her, but privately she knew this was a battle Kaitlyn wouldn’t win. Her parents and siblings had watched every game for the last two years – ever since a friend of the family had joined the team and quickly risen to be one of its stars – and Tessa had been forced to watch it too. She didn’t really mind, and honestly when the Virtue and Moir clans got together for games it was always guaranteed to be a good time with fantastic food, but she would definitely not be seeking out the youngest Moir boy on campus, or going to watch him play.

 

            The Virtue and Moir families had been friends for decades. Ever since Kate had been roommates with Alma and Carol at university. When they all ended up living relatively close to each other in London and Ilderton, the friendship stuck and eventually all the kids became friends too. Alma and Carol coached ice skating, and Kate signed her kids up to be taught by them.

            Tessa was paired with Alma’s youngest, Scott, as an ice dancing team. They’d been naturals at it, and Tessa had loved it - but eventually the pain in her shins became too much to continue in any sort of professional capacity. Scott switched to hockey, but they stayed friends. Too many formative years spent skating and taking naps together and sharing jokes for that to change- not to mention all the joint family barbecues. 

            At one time Tessa had thought Scott was her  _best_ friend. There wasn’t anything she didn’t tell him and they hardly went a day without seeing or talking to each other. When he’d expressed dreams of pursuing a hockey career, she’d always been the first one to encourage him. Cheering him on from the stands at every game.

            But then the night before his high school graduation had happened. And Tessa hadn’t spoken to him since.

 

\----------------

 

_The night before Scott’s graduation, 2005_

 

            “Come get ice cream with me.” Scott pleaded from where he sat on Tessa’s bedroom floor, fiddling with his Gameboy more than playing it and acting restless.

            “Scott, you know I can’t. I have a test in the morning.” She reminded him for the third time with a patient smile and a shake of her head.

            “It’s just cruel that Mr. Sanders is giving you a test on the last day. There should be rules against that.”

            “But there aren’t, and he is.” Tessa turned back to her history book, determined not to let Scott distract her. Something which was becoming harder and harder to do. These days all he had to do was smile at her and she caved to his demands. Having just turned sixteen, Tessa had been steadily becoming more aware of Scott as a _boy_ for the past two years. Next to him she felt awkward and gangly – all freckles and limbs next to his easy grace and muscled frame from years of playing hockey. Which had paid off, as he’d been promised a full-ride to the University of Toronto in the fall.

            “Come on, T. I’m graduating tomorrow. I want to celebrate with my best friend.” She made the mistake of looking at him, and his big pleading eyes broke her instantly.

            “Alright, fine. But it’s straight to the ice cream shop and then right back here. I have to get an A.”

            “Deal.” He’d already shot up off the floor and was reaching his hand out for hers, and Tessa helplessly took it.

 

            Minutes later they were walking into their favorite ice cream store, and Scott was instantly greeted by a group of giggling, blushing girls who all melodically called out, “Hi, Scott.”

            “Ladies.” He smirked and nodded at them, leading an incredibly self-conscious Tessa behind him. Painfully aware of her ratty Hall & Oates t-shirt and sweatpants next to their well-fitted jeans and tube tops. It didn’t matter though, they took no notice of her, despite the fact that her hand was still in Scott’s. It was just an accepted fact that little Tessa Virtue trailed around with Scott sometimes, quiet and unassuming and definitely not a romantic threat.

            “Get whatever you want, kiddo. I’m buying.”

            Kiddo. The most unsexy nickname. Tessa wanted to shrivel up and die. Instead she smiled and said, “Chocolate, of course.” Eliciting the grin from Scott that she knew she would.

            “Of course.” He nodded, pretending to be serious for a second, before grinning again – his eyes doing that squinting thing she secretly loved.

           

            After Scott ordered his cookie dough ice cream they took their frozen treats back to Tessa’s house and climbed out of her window onto the roof like they used to do as kids. Staring up at the stars as they appeared one by one in the fading twilight. Tessa was content to just sit in silence. She was very aware of the heat radiating off of Scott's body as he sat with his shoulder touching hers. Did he have to sit so close? If she tried to make conversation her voice would probably come out an octave too high and he'd know something was up. Better to just focus on her ice cream.

            “Look! A shooting star.” Scott called out, pointing to where it was just disappearing over the horizon. “Make a wish, T.”

            She looked into his beaming face and thought, _I wish I could tell you how I feel_. He was so close. She could see the flecks of color in his eyes and smell the cologne he’d gotten at Hollister because it was “cool.” And for a brief second she thought she saw something flicker in his expression and it gave her hope. Feeling reckless, she pressed her lips to his.

            For one brief, shining moment, Scott kissed her back – but then he was pulling away, a look of panic on his face. “What are you doing?!”

            “I’m sorry. I just thought-“ Tessa scrambled, looking anywhere but at him.

            “Thought what!?” His voice sounded all strangled and if Tessa was braver she would fling herself off the roof right then. _It was only a kiss_ – his reaction seemed way out of proportion. She knew for a fact that he’d kissed lots of girls. He'd never made any secret of it.  

            Taking a chance, Tessa confessed, “I’m sorry, Scott. I’ve just had this crush on you for a while now and I thought maybe you might feel the same.”

            Looking everywhere but her, Scott replied - his voice cracking like it hadn't done for months - “I like you, kiddo, of course I do. But like a little sister, you know?” He awkwardly slugged her shoulder with his fist, and Tessa wanted to die. _Little sister_.

            “Sure. I get it.” She blinked back tears. She would _not_ cry in front of him. “It’s no big deal. I’ve got to get back to studying.” Refusing to look at him, Tessa climbed back in through the window and sat down at her desk – burying her nose in the pages.

            He followed right behind. “Tess, are you okay? Are we okay?”

            Taking a steadying breath, Tessa gave him a watery smile, “Everything’s just dandy. No worries. I’ve just really got to study.”

            Scott nodded and stood there awkwardly, looking like a fish out of water who had no idea how to handle the situation. “I guess I’ll head home then.”

            “Sounds good.” She didn’t look at him, pretending to take notes instead, as if the Battle of Trafalgar was endlessly fascinating right now.

            “I’ll see you tomorrow though? At graduation?”

            “Absolutely.”

            She didn’t turn to watch him go, instead waiting until she heard the front door close downstairs before bursting into tears. 

 

\------------------- 

 

            Two years of careful avoidance – of being forced to watch his games and hear about his life from his mom and aunt. Dodging phone calls and leaving his texts unanswered. Two years of keeping what had happened a secret from everyone in her family (well, everyone but Jordan, who knew everything about Tessa’s life). Two years of burying any feelings she’d had under layers of schoolwork and new friends and a part time job at a little shop called Saffron Road.

            U of T was a big place. Nothing was going to change just because they shared a campus.   


	3. Chapter 2: The Great Unknown

            Tessa finished her first Monday as a university student feeling confident and ready to take on the school year. Her PSY 100 class was going to be endlessly fascinating, which reassured her that she had picked the right major, and her English class on the Canadian Short Story was going to be a good challenge.

            She woke up Tuesday refreshed and ready for anything. Her first class of the day was History 103: An Introduction to International Relations – which fulfilled one of her mandatory general education requirements. The day was bright and sunny, and she decided to treat herself to her favorite latte at Starbucks on her way to campus.

 

            The lecture hall was in one of the older rooms. The kind that had curved, multi-level stadium seating with tiny chairs. A quick scan of the room’s layout helped her determine that the best seat would be on the far side in the second row. Close to the front, without being too centered. She had arrived early, so no one else was sitting over there yet, and she kind of hoped it would stay that way. The chairs were the kind with the armchair desktops that could be folded in and out. It took about two seconds for her to decide she hated them – they were hardly big enough for a piece of paper.  

            Determined not to lose her good mood, she pulled out a fresh notebook and a pencil, neatly writing the course title on the front page. Professor Mallon was still unpacking her briefcase, so Tessa distracted herself by doodling stars and flowers on the corner of her paper while the other students filed in.  Out of the corner of her eye she caught a glance of familiar features.  _Too_ familiar.

            Tessa hastily pulled her textbook up over her face, peaking behind it to see if her suspicions were correct.  _No. Please no. It can’t be._

 

            But it was.

 

           The quick look she took confirmed Scott Moir was indeed walking into her classroom. He looked around, trying to decide on a seat, and his eyes passed over her before doing a double-take. Tessa looked away – burying her face close to the desk and praying to every deity that she could think of that he hadn’t recognized her.

 

           “Tessa Virtue?”

           She cringed and looked up to see Scott maneuvering his way into the seat next to her. “Wow. I hardly recognized you! You’ve changed your hair.”

            Tessa grabbed the strands hanging over her shoulder self-consciously. She’d dyed it dark brown on a whim Sunday night with Kaitlyn – who had said a new look might help with her self-confidence.

           “Yeah.”  _Nice, Tessa. Good response._  But it was all she could seem to manage. She hadn’t prepared to see him at all and his sudden appearance had left her reeling. It didn’t helped that he looked good – a little taller, broader, more muscled, his hair just as thick and wild. So  _Scott_. Her heart gave a traitorous leap inside her chest.

           “It’s so good to see you.” He smiled warmly, and Tessa felt her cheeks heating up.

           “Hi. I didn’t know you would be in this class.” Came her intelligent reply. She was seriously considering standing up and walking out. Would that be too obvious? Why oh why hadn’t she sat closer to the exit?

           “It’s my last general course. What a coincidence, eh?” He looked so genuinely excited to see her, sitting there in his Leafs t-shirt with his friendly smile and easy charm. Tessa could feel the temptation to fall back into old behaviors – as if the past two years hadn’t happened. “It’s been a long time, kiddo.”

           And there it was. The bucket of ice water that she needed to force her back to the present. In a cool, flat voice, she said, “A very long time.”

           His smile fell and she felt a twinge of guilt, but she couldn’t go back to how things were. She had to protect her heart – which had always been too uncontrollable around him.

           She was saved from any further conversation by the professor starting the lecture, although she couldn’t help but notice the searching looks Scott kept giving her all throughout the lesson.

           _Make it through the lecture_. That’s all she had to do. Then she could switch classes. It was still the first week, so changing course schedules was allowed. Everything would be fine.

          “This semester we’re going to be focusing on the role of war as an instrument of national policy, as a determinant of the system of states, and as a threat to international society. I’ll be splitting you into groups and assigning you one of these three topics. There will be group projects due throughout the semester, and a final presentation at the end worth twenty percent of your grade. I’ve already put the groups together – please pay attention while I read out the lists.”

           Nine groups, five students in each. Tessa felt like a rock had settled in her stomach.  _Please not Scott. Please_.

           “Group four: Tessa Virtue, Michael Adams, Sarah Black, TJ Knight, and Scott Moir.”

 

           Crap.

 

           “This’ll be fun, eh?” Scott gave her a nudge with his elbow, oblivious to her agony. She definitely couldn’t drop the class now or it would be totally obvious why.

           “Yeah. Way fun.”

 

            Each group gathered together at the end of class to trade emails and phone numbers and introduce themselves. At least the other three students seemed like they were committed to doing a good job. They’d been assigned war as a threat to international policy, and their first assignment was to write a joint short essay using one country as an example.

            “Let’s meet at the library on Saturday.” TJ suggested, his English accent taking Tessa by surprise.

            “Oh! What part of England are you from?”

            “South London.” He smiled at her, and Tessa smiled back. He was pretty cute – maybe some good would come out of this whole group thing.

            “What time Saturday? There’s a hockey game that night.” Scott cut in, interrupting whatever little flirty thing was going on between her and TJ.

            “Ten?” Sarah suggested, pushing her short red hair behind her ear.

            “That should be fine. I’ll just have to leave for hockey practice at eleven-thirty.” Scott nodded.

            “I didn’t know you were on the hockey team.” Sarah was looking at Scott all starry-eyed, and Tessa had to get out of there immediately. She could barely handle talking to Scott again – she wasn’t about to stand there and watch him flirt as well.

             “Ten o’clock on Saturday. Great. Well I’ve got to get to my UC One course.” Tessa interrupted. “It was nice meeting you all.” Spinning around on her heel, she marched out of the classroom – determined to escape.

             “What one did you decide to do?” TJ asked, catching up to her as she walked out of the room. Scott had followed them out, but Tessa blatantly ignored him.

            “104. The Sex in the City one.”

            Scott made a strange choking sound from behind them, and Tessa turned around with a lofty eyebrow. “Are you okay?”

            “Yup.” He quickly regained his composure. “Why did you pick that one? Trying to be the next Carrie Bradshaw?”

            Tessa was less than amused. “It’s about sexual politics in Toronto and explores what sex means to the various communities in the city. This year they’re focusing on youth and queer identity. It’s the most relevant one to my psychology major.”

            “That’s really cool.” TJ spoke up, drawing her attention away from Scott. “I’m in 103 – the health care one. Can I walk you to class?”

            It sounded so old-fashioned with his accent, Tessa had to giggle. “Sure.”

            “Tess?” Scott sounded confused and a little hurt that she was brushing him off, but Tessa smothered her feelings of guilt. She didn’t owe him anything.

            “I’ll see you around, Scott.” With an overly bright, friendly smile she waved goodbye – a little awkward half-wave that she was probably going to feel mortified about later – and walked away with TJ.

 

\------------------

 

            “Stupid boys.” Tessa grumbled and kicked the mini fridge as she entered her dorm room. Kaitlyn was already home, sitting on the floor painting her toenails and listening to her iPod. The loud vocals of P!nk could be heard even from where Tessa was standing.

             Her attempted mutilation of an inanimate object did not go unnoticed, however. “Hey, can you not do that? We share the fridge, remember?” Kaitlyn looked up at her, pausing mid stroke and removing one of her headphones as she spoke.

            “Sorry. Just … bad day.” Tessa flopped down on her bed with a whoosh, arms spread wide like a starfish.

            “Do you want to talk about it?” Kaitlyn knelt by the bed so that she could look at her. 

            Tessa sighed, “A guy I grew up with is in my history class. I wasn’t expecting to see him and it threw me for a loop.”

            With a squeal Kaitlyn had jumped on the bed next to her. “Oooh tell me everything. Ex-boyfriend?”

            “No, nothing like that. An ex-friend. Don’t get your nail polish on my duvet!” Tessa commanded, shoving Kaitlyn away with a laugh. The disappointed look on her face was almost comical. Kaitlyn lived for drama and had been clearly hoping for a juicy story.

            “Bummer. Is it super weird or can you avoid him?” She sat back down on the floor to continue her work.

            “Can’t avoid him. We’re in the same study group.”

            “Ouch.”

            “Yeah.” Tessa sighed again. The glow of the new school year having dimmed at this unwelcome development. Just then, her pocket buzzed. She pulled out her phone – it was a new flip phone and one of the first to have a camera built-in. A gift from her mother who made her promise to send photos of her life at college every once in a while.  

 

              **Scott:**  Hey T! It was great seeing you today. Maybe we could get coffee some time and catch up? :)

 

             Tessa stared down at the message. Struggling internally – debating how to answer. Or if she should even answer at all.

             “Is that him?” Kaitlyn glanced up, seeing Tessa nod. “What does he want?”

            “He wants to get coffee and catch up.” She made air quotes with her fingers as she said the last part. Tessa didn’t need to catch up. She knew he played hockey, was majoring in business, and had dated a girl named Jessica off and on last year. His family had kept her pretty updated for the past two years – whether she’d asked them to or not (she hadn’t... most of the time).

            “Tell him you’re too busy.”

             Biting her lip, Tessa texted him back.

 

              **Tessa:**  Too busy with school. See you Saturday though.

 

            She waited, biting her nails as the minutes went by. A habit she’d spent the last two years breaking. Scott seemed to bring up a lot of anxiety that she thought she’d left in the past. Finally he replied with a simple, “Okay.” Tessa didn’t know if she was relieved or disappointed that he’d given in so quickly.

           “Ugh. I stand by what I said. Boys are stupid.”  The last thing she needed was pesky  _emotions_  getting in the way of her schoolwork. And Scott brought up all sorts of emotions that she didn’t exactly want to spend time unraveling.

 

\---------------

 

           Thankfully, history class was only once a week, and Tessa did a pretty good job of putting Scott out of her mind until their Saturday group meeting. She didn’t think about him when she passed by the Varsity stadium, or when she called home to her mom and got an earful about Alma and Carol’s new ice skating students, or when she put her iPod on shuffle and Call Me Irresponsible started to play – a song they’d ice danced to as kids.

           By the time Saturday rolled around she’d thought about him so little that her finger nails had all been chewed painfully short.

 

          She showed up early to the pre-agreed upon meeting place at the library, taking the seat in the corner of the table with only one chair next to it, hoping that TJ or one of the other kids would sit next to her.

           No such luck. Scott was the next one to come waltzing in, carrying a cardboard drink tray with two coffee cups in it. “Hey, T. I brought you a latte since you couldn’t meet me this week. I wasn’t sure what kind you liked, but I hope almond milk is okay.”

           Touched, Tessa replied with a small, genuine smile. “That’s perfect. Thank you.”

           Scott looked like she’d just told him he cured cancer. “You’re welcome.” He beamed as he took the seat next to hers.

           The other group members started filing in, taking the other seats around the table. Scott had to scoot his chair closer to hers to make room, and she caught a whiff of his cologne. Something new and much more subtle than he used to wear. It smelled… really good. She had to fight the urge to lean in closer.  _Get a grip, Tessa!_

 

           Overall the meeting went really well, despite Tessa continually getting caught up in analyzing Scott and making a mental list of all the ways he was the same and different now.

           Hair: longer

           Smile: just as wide, maybe not always as genuine

           Shoulders: Nice. Muscular.  ~~She wanted to touch them.~~

           Lips:  ~~Tempting~~ not worth noting.

           Hands: Distracting...

 

           The group decided to start easy with British imperialism as an obvious example of war as being a threat to international policy.

           “No offense, dude.” Michael looked at TJ, who laughed.

           “None taken. It’s not like I’m unaware of Britain’s colonialist history.” He gestured to his dark skin, and everyone chuckled  - including Tessa, and he winked at her. Scott was suddenly very tense by her side, but Tessa assumed it was because he had practice and realized that it was time to leave.

 

            “Are you coming to the game tonight?” Scott asked hopefully as they packed up their supplies.

            “Um… no. Sorry.” Tessa shrugged a little, pulling her backpack over her shoulder and moving past him towards the exit. Dropping her empty coffee cup in the waste bin on the way.

            “Oh…” He sounded disappointed, which didn’t make much sense. It’s not like she’d ever been before.

            “I’ve got a lot of laundry to do.” She lied, and she could tell Scott knew she was making up an excuse, but he let it slide with a sad smile.  

            “See you in class, then.”

            She couldn’t seem to help giving him a small smile, every part of her screaming to make him feel better and wipe that sad look off his face. “Yeah, you will. Bye, Scott. Thanks again for the coffee.”

            He surprised her by reaching out and grabbing her hand. “Anytime, T.” With a little squeeze he turned and walked away, and Tessa felt like a piece of her heart was walking away with him. The piece she’d given him long ago and, it seemed, hadn’t never really gotten back.

             


	4. Chapter 3: Everybody's Lonely

        “Are you sure I can’t convince you to come tonight?” Kaitlyn pleaded from inside the bathroom where she was carefully curling her hair.

        “Yes.” Tessa replied with an exasperated laugh. She was comfortably lounging on her bed – dressed in her favorite sweatpants and reading her battered copy of _Pride & Prejudice_.

        “But it’s the first game of the season.” Kaitlyn shouted.

        “So you’ve said.” Tessa yelled back, rolling her eyes.

         After a few minutes, Kaitlyn emerged from the bathroom. “Do I look okay?” Her hair was perfectly curled and her make-up had been expertly applied. She was dressed in a denim skirt and a fitted Varsity Blues t-shirt.

         “You look amazing.” Tessa told her honestly. “You know it’s just a hockey game though, right?”

          “I’ve got front row seats, Tess. And I happened to overhear that the players like to go to the Dog and Bear after the game for drinks. I’ve got to look my best.”

          “Just happened to hear, eh?” Tessa arched an eyebrow at her friend, laughing at Kaitlyn’s overly innocent expression. “Have fun. Try not to get into too much trouble.”

          “Wouldn’t dream of it.” Kaitlyn blew her a kiss and walked out the door, leaving Tessa to her own devices for the evening.

 

           Tessa had a list of ways she was going to pamper herself tonight and was looking forward to checking off each one. She needed it after dealing with her history group meeting earlier that morning.

  1.  Eat lots of chocolate
  2. Give self a proper pedicure – break out the good bath salts
  3. Do laundry while everyone else is at the game
  4. Finish P&P



 

         The night started strong. She painted her nails a cute shade of pale pink, felt luxurious in her face mask while waiting for them to dry, and listened to her favorite Hall & Oates album. Feeling refreshed, she grabbed her laundry basket and headed downstairs.

         After putting in the first load, she went back up - intending to keep reading, but, well, the game was on in the common room and she had to stop for a second, just to check the score. Telling herself it was just a quick glance and she would go to her room soon. If she cheered when Scott scored the opening goal, she'd never admit it.

 

         Later that night, after turning out the lights and crawling into bed – feeling a sense of satisfaction that was in no way related to the Blues winning the game – Kaitlyn came staggering in, clearly a little tipsy. She collapsed on top of her bed with an emphatic _whoompf_.

         “Good night?” Tessa asked with a chuckle.

         “Compl—suck—m’cute---b.” Came the muffled reply.

         Laughing in earnest now, Tessa sat up. “I’m sorry, what was what?”

          Kaitlyn lifted her head like it was infinitely heavy. “I said: Complete success. Met a cute boy.”

         “Mmhmm. Tell me more.”

         “Goaltender. Andrew.” That seemed to be all that she could manage before her head fell back into the pillow.

         With a little sigh and an affectionate roll of her eyes, Tessa got out of bed and padded to the bathroom – filling up a glass of water and retrieving some aspirin out of the medicine cabinet for her friend.

 

* * *

 

 

         The door was mocking her. Tessa stared at the wood, picking out all the variations in the grain and having a very stern mental discussion – trying to force herself to just bite the bullet and go inside.

         “Are you gonna move?” A rude voice asked from behind her. Embarrassed, Tessa took a deep breath and pushed it open.

         She was early again, and this time decided to sit up on the fourth row behind an abnormally tall student. She’d have to crane her neck to see the board around him, but it was worth it for the chance to hide from Scott.

         She kept a sharp eye on the door this time, not wanting to be surprised when he entered. When he finally did walk in, his gaze immediately went to the seat she’d been in last week. He looked disappointed not to find her there, and Tessa tried to ignore how that made her feel.

         He started scanning the room, and that was of course when Tall Guy decided to lean forward and pull something out of his backpack – putting Tess directly in Scott’s line of sight. He grinned and ran up the steps, falling comfortably into the seat next to her.

         “Here you are. I was worried for a sec that you wouldn’t be in class today.”

         Tessa shrugged awkwardly. “Well, here I am.”

         “How was your weekend? Did you get your laundry done?” He offered her a piece of gum, which she accepted with a grateful smile.

         “It was good, yeah. Congrats on the win. You played really well.” She blurted out, instantly wishing she could take the words back. She didn’t want him knowing that she cared.

         He knocked his shoulder against hers, clearly pleased. “You watched it?”

         “No. I mean… I saw part of it. A small part. And my roommate Kaitlyn told me about it.” She hastened to clarify. Although, yes, she _had_ watched it – she blamed her laundry for taking longer than expected. It was just easier to stay downstairs while she waited instead of going back and forth from her dorm room.

         Scott’s eyes twinkled as he nodded. “Sure.” A playful grin threatening to break free. “I met your roommate after the game. She’s really fun – a firecracker. Not like you at all.” He chuckled, but Tessa leaned back offended.

         “What’s that supposed to mean?”

         Sensing his mistake, Scott hurried to correct himself. “Nothing! I just meant that you’re shy. Introverted – you know? That’s it.”

         She glared at him. It was true, of course, but that didn’t mean she was _boring_.

         “Hi Tessa. Scott.” TJ took the seat on Tessa’s other side, giving them both a friendly smile as he sat down.

        “Hi, TJ.” She smiled warmly back at him, grateful for the distraction – still rankled by Scott’s comment. Scott’s own greeting was decidedly colder, but they both ignored it. “How was the rest of your weekend? Did you finish _Pride & Prejudice_?”

         TJ had texted her a few times since Saturday morning, asking what she was up to and talking about books and movies that they both liked.

         “No. I’m just getting to the part where Elizabeth goes to Pemberley.”

         "Ah, so it’s starting to get good.” TJ smirked at her and she giggled in agreement, butterflies fluttering in her stomach.

         “Tess made me watch the scene with Mr. Darcy in the lake about a million times as a kid.” Scott said, leaning forward into Tessa’s personal space, giving her a teasing look. “Had a bit of a crush, didn’t you T?”

         “I prefer the new one with Keira Knightley.” TJ replied, giving Scott an appraising look – like he was just really noticing him for the first time. Tessa could feel her anxiety ramping up, being caught in the middle like she was.

         “What’s wrong with the original? Tess and I thought it was pretty perfect.” The way the two of them were looking at each other could only mean an argument was brewing, and Tessa couldn’t handle that right now.

         Attempting to keep the peace, she took a neutral position. “They both have their strengths.” She gestured to where Professor Mallon was preparing to begin the lecture. “We should probably pay attention.” To her relief, they both sat back in their chairs – going quiet as the professor began speaking.

 

         Tessa tried to concentrate on taking notes, she really did, but she kept getting distracted watching Scott’s hand move across his own notebook. He really had great hands – had he always had hands like that? Did she ever notice them before? Why was she noticing them _now_ – they were just hands for pete’s sake. She seriously needed to get a grip on her raging hormones.

 

         Professor Mallon ended the lecture with a reminder about their next group project, and Tessa threw her stuff into her backpack – not taking the time to carefully arrange everything like she normally would – and shot up out of her seat. “See you guys Saturday.”

         As she walked away from the building her phone dinged in her pocket. Pulling it out, she saw she had a text from Scott.

 

 **Scott:** The original was better. ;)

 

 **Tessa:** Better overall. The new one has better music.

 

 **Scott:** You take that back, Tessa Jane Virtue!

 

 **Tessa:** Listen to it and tell me I’m wrong.

 

         She closed her phone and put it away, feeling unnaturally warm and fuzzy inside. When it dinged again, she pulled it out with a smile that she couldn’t seem to keep contained, but was surprised to see TJ’s name on the screen.

 

 **TJ:** I’d like to hear more about your opinions on classic literature and their cinematic counterparts. Can I take you to dinner on Saturday?

 

         Tessa hesitated, stopping in her tracks and nearly getting run down by a bike in the process. Ultimately, this could only be good right? She’d dated in high school, even had a boyfriend for a little while, but it had been a long time and it would probably be good to get back out there. Kaitlyn would be so proud of her.

 

 **Tessa:** Sure. 6:00? I like Italian.

 

 **TJ:** Perfect. I’ll see you then.

 

          Taking a shaky breath, she continued the walk home.

 

* * *

 

 

         “We’re going out tonight.” Kaitlyn announced a couple weeks later as she walked into their dorm room after her art class.

         “We are?” Tessa asked skeptically, barely glancing up from her psych homework.

         “Yes, Miss Recluse, we are. Andrew – remember the cute hockey player? – invited us country dancing. Apparently there’s a whole group going.”

         “I’m not a recluse.” Tessa muttered. She’d been out a with TJ a lot in the last few weeks. It was going well, surprisingly well, and she was actually starting to feel comfortable around him.

         “Going on a couple dates doesn’t count as not being a hermit. Your grades aren’t going to collapse if you go a little crazy one night.” Kaitlyn started rummaging around in Tessa's closet, tossing clothes on her bed with either a nod or a shake of her head.

        “Kait…” Tessa groaned in protest. She needed more warning before committing to social outings so that she could work up the necessary mental preparation.

        “Nope. I need a wing-woman, so you don’t have a choice.” She reached into the back of the closet, shouting in triumph when she found a light-blue checkered shirt that Tessa didn’t even remember owning. “Perfect. Put this on and your good jeans – the ones that make your ass look fantastic.”

         Knowing a lost cause when she saw one, Tessa followed the command obediently. Although not without a few dirty looks in Kaitlyn’s direction.

         Being from Texas, Kaitlyn had a slew of outfit options to choose from. Ultimately she went with a pink plaid shirt, daisy dukes, and an adorable pair of cowboy boots. She fixed her hair into pigtails and tied the shirt in a knot beneath her breasts, exposing her midriff. Somehow she managed to make the ensemble look good instead of cheesy.

         “Here. Let me fix yours.” She walked over and tied Tessa’s shirt to match.

         “Kait I can’t wear it like this.” She tried to tug her shirt down, but Kaitlyn had tied it perfectly and it refused to budge.

         “Tess, please, you have abs for days.” She scoffed, fixing the shirt where Tessa had tugged at it. “It’s country dancing and you’re going to be the hottest girl there. Just don’t flirt with Andrew.” She winked and Tessa snorted. As if she’d ever really flirted with _anyone_ , let alone intended to do so tonight. Mostly she just wanted to make it out unscathed.

         She checked her ponytail in the mirror and let Kaitlyn touch up her make-up before following her best friend out the door.

         “Do you know who else will be there?” Tessa asked tentatively as they walked down the street, their clothes earning curious glances from a few passers-by.

         “No idea. Andrew just said a couple teammates and a few of his other friends. I didn’t get a guest list.”

         Tessa nodded and prayed that Scott wasn’t one of the friends. She knew hockey teams had fairly large rosters – maybe he and Andrew hardly knew each other. She kept her fingers crossed the entire way there.

 

          They arrived at Wranglers a little after seven to find it already crowded. Everyone there was dressed in various stereotypical cowboy outfits, so Tessa felt a little less self-conscious about her own clothes. The music was blasting loudly from the large wooden dance floor, where people were mostly grinding and moving to the beat, instead of doing a square-dance or do-si-do. It seemed “country dancing” was really just an excuse to dress up and go wild.

         “Kait!” A male voice called out from across the room, and the girls looked over to see Andrew waving at them from a large booth. It was already full of a bunch of guys and a few of their girlfriends, and they barely managed to squeeze into the seat at the end. Tessa let out a sigh of relief when she couldn’t see Scott anywhere with them (and maybe a twinge of disappointment that she didn’t want to examine too closely.)

 

         “Ladies, so glad that you could make it.” Andrew greeted both of them, but he only had eyes for Kaitlyn – who blushed under his warm gaze. Tessa had never seen Kaitlyn act shy before, and she smiled. She would definitely be teasing her about this later.“We couldn’t resist the promise of dancing, could we Tess?”

         “Well, I could-“ She began, getting a swift elbow in the side from Kaitlyn. “-n’t wait. We love it. Kaitlyn is a really good dancer.”

         Andrew’s mouth crooked up, his eyes going a little darker, “I can’t wait to see that.”

         A large tray of beer landed on the table in front of them amidst loud cheers and applause and cries of “ _Finally”_ from everyone in the booth.

         “Sorry it took so long. The line for the bar is practically out the door.”

         Tessa knew that voice. And although she rarely ever swore, the word _shit_ entered her mind. It was an accurate portrayal of the dismay that she felt. Scott hadn’t noticed her yet though, and she tried to make herself smaller – shrinking into Kaitlyn’s side as best she could, earning a curious glance from her friend.

         The plan failed as soon as Scott plopped down into the seat across from her.

         “Tess!” His eyebrows shot up. “Hi!” He didn’t seem displeased, although he was definitely surprised.

         “You two know each other?”  Kaitlyn looked back and forth between them.

         “We-“

         “We’re in the same history class.” Tessa cut him off quickly.

         “We grew up together.” Scott finished his sentence, and a look of understanding dawned on Kaitlyn’s face.

         “Oh. I see.” She turned to Tessa. “You didn’t tell me your childhood friend was _Scott Moir_ , the _star_ of the hockey team.”

         Tessa squeezed her eyes shut tight, hoping that maybe just this once she could sink into the floor.

         “It’s just Scott.” He gave Kaitlyn a charming smile, running his hand through his hair and throwing Tessa a little wink. "I didn't know Tess talked about me." 

         “I don't." She lied, muttering to Kaitlyn, "It didn’t seem relevant at the time.” Kaitlyn gave her a look that clearly said they would be talking about it later.

 

          The guys got louder as the drinks kept coming and the night went on, and each time someone got up to get refills Kaitlyn managed to scoot a little closer to Andrew – until finally she was by his side. They were having a surprisingly deep conversation about their families and childhood, completely caught up in their own bubble. Tessa watched them with a little smile on her lips – genuinely happy that things were going well.

          Across from her, girls kept coming up to talk to Scott all night. Tall girls, short girls, girls with a million different looks and styles. Each one prettier than the last and all of them getting the patented Scott Moir treatment. He would smile and tell jokes, giving them his complete attention. Tessa imagined that this was what hell felt like.

          She didn’t normally drink, as she was still under the legal age, so when one of the guys came up to the table yelling “Shots! Shots! Shots!” She had every intention of declining. “Let’s go!” The guy, Andy or Aaron or Adam, or something with an A, began handing out the glasses, starting with Tessa.

          “Aaron, Tessa’s not drinking.” Scott cut in with a sharp glance. She hadn’t realized he’d noticed, but she was instantly irked.

          “What? Bor-ing.” Aaron slurred, taking her shot back. Instantly Tessa felt white hot rage shoot through her. She was _not_ boring!

          “Yes, I am.” She grabbed the glass from Aaron’s hand, spilling a little on the table, and downed it in one go. The tequila burned – making her eyes water as she tried not to cough. Slamming the glass down on the table she shouted, “Again!”

           “Yeah, girl! That’s what I’m talkin’ about!” Aaron gave her a high five and handed her another shot. She drank it, plus two more – ignoring Scott’s wary expression.

           She hadn’t had much to eat all day, so the alcohol started taking effect almost immediately. She’d never been drunk before, and decided she liked the feeling. Like she still could think properly, but no longer cared about consequences. For a control-freak like her, it was incredibly liberating. She reached for another one, but Scott’s hand shot out to stop her.

           “Whoa, T. Take it easy.”

           She glared at him. “You’re not my brother.”

           He looked confused. “I know. I’m just looking out for you.”

           “Ugh. Whatever. I’m gonna go dance.” The world tilted as she stood up and she had to grab the edge of the table to steady herself. Once she caught her bearings, she noticed that Scott’s gaze had landed on her bare stomach, and she was secretly pleased at the way his eyes lingered there. She should really listen to Kaitlyn's style advice more often.

 

           On the dancefloor, Tessa let herself get lost in the music. She had always loved dancing, and she was good at it. The tequila in her veins was making her feel free and bold and she danced with abandon.

           “Mind if I join you?” She opened her eyes - which she hadn’t realized were closed - to see a not-unattractive guy standing across from her. He had shaggy, dirty blonde hair and blue eyes, and wasn’t really her type at all. Happy dancing by herself, she was about to refuse him when she saw Scott getting chatted up by a busty bottle-blonde who was showing off so much cleavage it was a little obscene – her tiny shorts slung low on her hips. 

           Scott was leaning up against the wall, arms folded, smiling down at her – not shrugging her off when she laughed and placed a hand on his arm. Her fingernails were painted a garish shade of magenta.

           Jealousy burst through Tessa’s body – hot and furious. Turning back to the patiently waiting boy next to her she nodded and let him place his hands on her waist. Giving the green monster inside her free reign to guide her movements, she let the boy touch her much more than she normally would.

           He spun her around, hands riding low on her stomach, and began grinding into her ass. Tessa wasn’t a virgin, but it had a been a while, and she couldn’t deny that it felt good to feel wanted again. She started rocking back into him, but suddenly he was gone and she was left with nothing but air behind her.

           “Hey man, keep your hands to yourself.”

           Confused, Tessa spun around to find Scott holding the guy by the shoulder, looking like he wanted to hit him.

           “What’s your problem, man?” The guy shoved Scott’s arm away, glaring at him and balling his hands into fists.

          “My problem is that she’s drunk and you’re clearly taking advantage of her.”

           Tessa opened her mouth to protest, but was hit by a wave of nausea and had to quickly close it again, breathing out of her nose.

          “Whatever.” The guy huffed and walked away. Clearly deciding it wasn’t worth fighting over.

           Scott turned to her, placing his hand on her back softly, “Are you okay?”

          “What the hell, Scott?” She shouted, shoving his hand away. He clearly wasn’t expected her outburst, and he stepped back.

          “What? I was just trying to help.” He looked sincere, but a little defensive at the same time.

          “I didn’t need your help. I was having a good time!”

          “With  _that_ guy?” Scott looked incredulous, which only made Tessa angrier. How dare he judge her when he was probably going to head home with Ms. Busty Boobs later.

          “With whomever I want.” She stated defiantly.

          “Don’t be ridiculous, Tess.” He folded his arms, looking down at her coolly.

          “You’re not my boss, or my father, or one of my brothers, or even my boyfriend, so you don’t get to tell me what to do or who I do it with. I am an independent woman.” She jabbed him in the chest with each punctuated statement, and he reached out quick as a flash and grabbed her wrist, causing her to fall forward into his chest by accident.

          “I’m not talking to you about this here. Let’s go outside.”

          Head spinning from their close proximity and the booze, she could only nod and let him lead her out back.

          “Here. Sit down while I go get you some water.” He stepped back inside for a moment and she started fiddling with the knot in her shirt. She couldn’t get it undone, and to her mortification she began crying. Which was how Scott found her when he returned a moment later.

          “Tess!? What’s wrong?” He rushed to sit down beside her, glass of cold water in tow. “Don’t cry. I’m sorry for getting mad, okay? Just don’t cry.” He was rubbing her back and speaking so gently that it only made more tears fall.

          “I’m not crying about you. I can’t get my stupid shirt undone.”

          Scott gulped loudly, ears turning pink. “Why are you trying to take your shirt off?”

          “No, idiot, I’m trying to untie it. My stomach’s cold.” She pulled at the knot uselessly.

          “Oh, uh… do you want me to do it for you?”

           In a move that she would definitely be embarrassed about in the morning, she plucked the water from his hand and leaned back, granting him better access. “Yes, please.”

          Scott carefully began undoing the knot, his fingertips brushing her skin periodically – making her reflexively suck in her stomach and giggle. “Ticklish.” She explained as his cheeks continued to darken. She wondered absentmindedly if he was cold too.

          “There.” Her shirt finally fell down, all wrinkled from being tied up, and Tessa sighed in relief – feeling more like herself.

          She gazed up at the night sky – starting to feel a little better after drinking the water.

          “Tess…” She glanced at Scott, who was looking at her with an intense, unreadable expression. He paused though and seemed to change his mind. “Let me walk you home.”

          She nodded and he helped her up off the bench.

 

          Tessa awoke the next morning feeling like a giant had sat on her head. Blinking in the bright light, she realized that she had fallen asleep in her partially unbuttoned shirt and with one leg of her jeans still on, lying diagonally across her duvet. Her ponytail was hanging lopsided off of her head. She must look dreadful.

          She rolled over to find a glass of water and some aspirin on her nightstand, as well as a note that read:

          “ _Hope you feel better in the morning. Don’t worry about coming to the group meeting today, I’ll cover for you._ ”

          It was signed _Scott_ , and all the memories of the previous night came flooding back. Tessa collapsed against her pillows with a groan.

          The bathroom door opened and Kaitlyn emerged wrapped in her fluffy pink bathrobe and her hair up in a towel. “Good morning, sleeping beauty.” She said, speaking louder than normal on purpose, and Tessa was tempted to throw a pillow at her.

          “Please tell me last night was just a nightmare.”

          “Oh no. Was the sex that bad?”

          Tessa shot up – holding her stomach to try and keep it from heaving. “What!? I didn’t have sex!”

          “You didn’t? I just assumed. You and Scott-“

          “Scott!? We aren’t – why would you think that?” Tessa panicked, tripping over her words.

          Kaitlyn laughed at her, eyes going wide at the overreaction. “Whoa. Calm down. I just thought, given the way he was looking at you all night and the fact that you left together, that something must have happened.”

          Not comprehending, Tessa asked, “What do you mean the way he was looking at me? Scott doesn’t look at me.”

          “Tessa,” Kaitlyn interrupted with a shake of her head, “That boy was looking at you like he wanted to have his way with you right there on the dance floor. For such a goofball, he really can get pretty intense. I bet he’s great in bed.”

          Tessa turned bright red. “Scott does not look at me like that.” Kaitlyn had to be wrong. Hadn’t Tessa seen him with other girls all night? Granted, she had tried not to look at him very often, but still – he had seemed pretty occupied.

          “I have _eyes_ , Tess. I’m not wrong.”

          “He thinks of me like a little sister.” She continued to protest.

          “If you think brothers look at their sisters like that, then I’ve got some serious questions about your family.” Kaitlyn joked, moving across the room to get dressed.

          “He told me so himself.”

          Kaitlyn snorted, “When?”

          “… Two years ago.” Tessa said in a quieter voice. She still didn’t like talking about it.

          Kaitlyn paused with her hands in a drawer. “Is that why you stopped being friends? Because you liked him and he said he didn’t like you back?”

         “I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” She stood up and began gathering supplies to take a shower of her own, nearly tripping over her loose pant-leg.

         “Okay, Tess.” Kaitlyn replied kindly. “But I think there’s more to the story there.”

         “We’re just friends. Besides, I’m kind of dating TJ anyway.”

         “As long as you’re happy, I’m happy.” Kaitlyn shrugged, but she was looking at her in a way that made Tessa feel like Kaitlyn knew something she didn’t.

          "Speaking of happy." Tessa desperately changed the subject. "How did it end up going with Andrew last night?" 

          Kaitlyn turned around with a sly smile on her face. "We danced. He walked me home. And we kissed on the doorstep. He's taking me to the movies next week." 

          Tessa let out a little squeal of excitement. "That's great, Kait! I'm so excited for you guys. He seems really nice." 

          "Thank, Tess." Kaitlyn smiled softly to herself, and it was great to see her so happy. "I hope it works out."

          "I'm sure it will." Tessa hugged her tightly, then pulled away. "Okay, I really need to shower. I feel gross." 


	5. Chapter 4: Don't Let Me Fall Behind

            Following the embarrassing Drunk Incident of Friday night, Tessa was very tempted to never leave her room again. The checkered shirt had gone directly into the trash Saturday morning – there was no way that tequila smell would be washing out. And although the headache had faded, the nausea reappeared every time she thought about the way she’d danced and argued with Scott.

            That Tuesday morning she purposely arrived later than usual to her history class, hoping that she would get there after Scott and TJ. When she walked into the classroom, a quick glance determined she was right. Scott was sitting up on the third row, and TJ was sitting front and center. Both men smiled and waved at her as she entered.

            Taking a deep breath to keep calm, she gestured for TJ to wait one second before climbing the stairs to where Scott was sitting.

            “Hey T. How ya feeling? I bet that was a pretty gnarly hangover.” He winced sympathetically.

            “Much better than I was Saturday. Listen, Scott, about Friday night – I’m really sorry. That behavior is so not like me and I feel awful about it. I don’t know what came over me.” She fiddled with the strap on her backpack, having a hard time looking him in the eye.

            “Hey, we’ve all done stupid things while drunk. Don’t worry about it. I’m sorry I acted like an ass.” Scott smiled a little sheepishly.

            “Thanks.” Tessa nodded awkwardly.

            “Are you going to sit down?” He gestured to the seat next to him, but Tessa knew she had to say no. She’d behaved terribly on Friday, mostly driven by jealousy, and she refused to let it continue. What she needed was some distance to get her head and heart re-centered.

            “Yeah. Over there, though.” She pointed to the seat by TJ, who was watching them closely. “I’ll see you around.” She gave him a little wave, before walking down the stairs to sit next to the other boy.

            “Everything okay?” TJ asked, glancing back at Scott, who was watching them with a sad and confused expression – tinged with something else that Tessa refused to call jealousy.

            “Yep. We had a fight, but it’s fine now.” She turned back to face the front of the room, determined to pay attention to the lecture. But she could feel Scott’s eyes boring into the back of her head all during class.

 

            _It’s fine_. A heavy weight had settled in her stomach, but she elected to ignore it. She didn’t like the person she’d become Friday night. Things with Scott had gotten her head all twisted up, and she had to put a stop to it – and that meant space.

            Plus, TJ was nice and funny and genuinely interested in her. He deserved her full attention. She refused to be one of those girls who played guys against each other.

 

* * *

 

 

            “So then, my mate Terry comes running down the hill screaming ‘It’s not a cat!’ And a whole bunch of raccoons are chasing him – mad as hell.”

            Tessa was laughing uncontrollably. TJ had taken her out to dinner at Bar Mercurio – a cute little Italian place north of campus with bright colored walls and delicious food. It was their third official _nice_ date, as opposed to just hanging out. She had been having a genuinely good time getting to know him and was trying not to focus on whether or not he would make a move tonight. So far he had been a perfect gentleman, giving her nothing more than a kiss on the cheek at the end of their other dates. But Tessa knew that third dates generally meant a turning point in relationships – physically, at least – and she wasn’t sure how tonight was going to go.

            They ordered gelato for dessert, splitting it between them, and then TJ helped her put on her coat and walked her home – holding her hand as they crossed campus. It felt nice. Simple and sweet.

            They reached the lobby of her building and Tessa's anxiety returned. She felt totally out of her depth. Was she supposed to invite him upstairs? Did he expect that? She hadn’t changed her sheets or even checked to see if Kaitlyn would be around tonight. Or, she remembered with a jolt, shaved her legs. The weather had turned cold and so, safely encased in jeans, she hadn’t thought at all about the state of her legs.  

            “I had a really nice time tonight.” He squeezed the hand that he was still holding a little tighter, eyes glancing at the elevator. Tessa started to feel a little panicky – her heart beating faster. Now that the moment was here, she wasn’t ready.

            “Me too. Thank you for dinner.”

            “It was my pleasure.” He leaned in slowly, is intentions clear, and Tessa closed her eyes. When his lips touched hers she felt a nice little spark, but that was it. No fireworks. He kissed her once, twice, three times – each one a soft press of his lips and nothing more, which she appreciated.

            She opened her eyes when he caressed her cheek to see him smiling at her. His eyes were warm and affectionate, although Tessa thought there was also a hint of disappointment in his features.

            “Goodnight, Tessa.”

            “Goodnight.”

            She watched him go, letting out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. Maybe she was supposed to be disappointed that he hadn’t asked for anything more, but she only felt relief.

 

           

            “So how was it? Passionate? Fiery? Or dull, awful, and boring?”

            Tessa had recapped the night for Kaitlyn as soon as she walked into the room and found her roommate waiting up for her. At the mention of her goodnight kiss, Kaitlyn had scrunched up her nose and pretended to gag.

            “It wasn’t awful!” Tessa laughed and Kaitlyn gave her a look of mock disgust.

            “Glowing praise.” She said sarcastically, and Tessa playfully shoved her.

            “It was good. Very romantic.”

            “Ew.” They both laughed again and Tessa rolled her eyes.

            “You’ve never even met him. Why are you so against him?” Tessa genuinely wanted to know. Kaitlyn had been against her dating TJ ever since the night they went country dancing.

            “Because I’m Team Scott, duh.”

            “Kaitlyn, we’ve been over this. There is no Team Scott.” She reminded her, feeling a little annoyed and trying to hide it. Why couldn’t she support the guy Tessa was actually dating, who was genuinely interested in her? Instead of pushing some sort of pipe dream.

            “I’m in it for the long haul, Tess. You’ll see I’m right someday.” Kaitlyn patted her hand gently, and then pressed play on her laptop. Tessa let herself be coerced into watching _She’s the Man_ (a cinematic classic), but she was still a little irked that Kaitlyn didn’t believe her when she said Scott was just a friend.

            She blamed it on the fact that Kaitlyn was spending so much time with Andrew – and inevitably saw Scott frequently during and after games. Of course she was on his team – Scott was a very likable guy! But that didn’t mean anything was going to happen between them.

            Her phone vibrated and Tessa glanced down at where it lay on the bed, surprised to see Scott’s name light up the screen.

 

            **Scott:** I rented a car to go home this weekend. You need a ride?

 

            **Tessa:** That would be great actually. Thanks!

 

            **Scott:** No problem! Pick you up at 3 tomorrow?

 

            **Tessa:** Perfect. :)

 

            Flipping her phone closed, she tossed it on her nightstand. She was nervous about being in a car with Scott for two hours, but she really wanted to go home for Thanksgiving and his offer was a godsend. It meant she wouldn’t have to take the train.

 

\-------------

 

            “Hey, T, ready to go?” He was leaning casually against the side of his rented Toyota Corolla, dressed in dark jeans and his leather Varsity Blues jacket, and Tessa couldn’t help but think how good he looked.

            “Yep! Let’s get this show on the road.”

            They started down the highway, classic rock playing quietly in the background, accompanied by a loaded silence. But Tessa had prepared for that. Anticipating that it would be awkward, she pulled her pre-prepared cards out of her purse.

            “So,” she began, “I brought flash cards so that we could study for our history midterm.” She held up the large stack so that Scott could see she meant business.

            “Great.” Came his less than enthusiastic reply, which Tessa chose to ignore.

            “Come on, it’ll be good. I’ll quiz you.”

            It was one of the smartest decisions Tessa had ever made, and she had made some pretty good decisions in her life. This way they avoided any awkward silence or conversations, _and_ she got in some extra study time. She really needed to get an A. The hours flew by as she quizzed him on all the topics that would be on their upcoming test. Before she knew it, they were driving down the familiar London roads and pulling up to her house.

            Her mother came running out before they even had a chance to park, all blonde hair and wide smiles, smothering Tessa in a hug as soon as she stepped out of the car.

            “Hi mom.” Her reply was muffled by Kate’s thick scarf – nearly making her choke on a mouthful of cotton.

            “It’s so good to have you home.” She pulled away. “And you too, Scott. You’re looking so grown up. Will you stay for dinner?”

            Scott had gotten out of the car to retrieve Tessa’s suitcase from the trunk, but he shook his head. “I appreciate the offer, Mrs. Virtue, but I’ve got to get home. My mom’s expecting me.”

            “Of course, of course. I hope we see you around this weekend. It’s good to see you and Tessa together again.” The look she gave them made Tessa blush, and she avoided Scott’s gaze as she yelled goodbye over her shoulder, practically pushing her mom back into the house.

 

            Thanksgiving at the Virtue house was an _Event_ with a capital E. Her mom pulled out all the stops – turkey, veggies, rolls, mashed potatoes, and five kinds of dessert. It was Tessa’s second favorite holiday after Christmas. 

            Everyone had made it home for the holiday, except for her brother Casey who was on a business trip to Vancouver. The atmosphere all weekend was warm and jovial and a much needed break from the stress of university.

 

            “Okay, what’s new – give me the run down.” Jordan climbed onto the couch next to Tess after dinner, a bucket of popcorn in tow – clearly ready for girl talk.

            So Tessa began telling her about her classes and schoolwork and Kaitlyn. But Jordan cut her off midstream when she started going into detail about Stanley Milgram’s psychological experiment on obedience to authority figures and how fascinating she found it.

            “Tess, I love you, but come on. I don’t want a psychology lecture, I want to hear about your social life. How’s it been with Scott? Mom said he gave you a ride home.”

            And so Tessa gave her sister the complete summary of the last two months, leaving nothing out because this was _Jordan_ and they didn’t keep secrets from each other. And Jordan, bless her, didn’t react more than the occasional nod or arched eyebrow – letting Tessa talk without interruption. Until finally she finished with a pathetic, “So yeah. That’s what’s been going on.”

            Jordan looked at her for a long moment, before taking in a deep breath. “Wow.”

            “I know.”

            “I can’t believe you got drunk. I wish I could have been there to see it.”

            “Never again.” Tessa said emphatically.

            “So… things are okay now? You’re happy dating TJ?” Jordan looked like she didn’t quite believe her.

            “Yeah. I mean, I think so. He’s really cute and nice. And I think it’s probably good for me to get over Scott.” Tessa shrugged, but secretly really wanted reassurance from Jordan that she was making the right choice.

            “I think you should get _under_ Scott.” Jordan smirked, laughing when Tessa yelled, “Jordan!” And hit her with a pillow.

            “I’m sorry. It’s just – didn’t we have this conversation two years ago? If you’re still trying to get over him, that probably says something.”

            “Yeah, it says I really need to grow up and get over this childish infatuation.”

            “ _Or_ that you and Scott are meant to be together and you need to tell him how you feel. I know he told you he wasn’t interested, but his behavior these days would suggest otherwise.”

            “Ugh. You sound like Kaitlyn. She thinks I should just kiss him and get it over with.”

            “I like this girl. She has good ideas.”

            Tessa rolled her eyes, shaking her head at her sister.

            “Seriously though, Tess. You’ve tried ignoring him for so long that it’s messed with your head. Maybe it’s time to give talking a try. Like friends.”

  

* * *

 

 

            Tessa propped her feet up on the dashboard as they turned onto the highway to head back to Toronto. Maybe Jordan was right. Maybe she’d been so caught up in _not_ thinking about him, it had twisted into kind of a morbid obsession. Maybe she should just try talking to him like normal.

            “What’s wrong?” Scott broke the silence, glancing at her in concern.

            “Nothing. Why?” Tessa hurried to answer, sitting up a little straighter.

            “Your forehead’s doing that little scrunchy thing it does when you’re thinking about something serious.” He reached over to poke at the spot between her eyebrows, and she swatted his hand away with a laugh.

            Deciding to just take the plunge, she blurted out, “Tell me about yourself.” Cringing internally at her choice of words. Thankfully, Scott just huffed out a laugh in surprise.

            “What?”

            “We haven’t really talked much. How’s school? And hockey?”

            He gave her a searching look, like he was trying to figure out if she felt okay, but answered her questions. And because he was Scott, the conversation flowed easily. He’d always been better at small talk than her – which is why he’d answered most of the questions in interviews when they skated as kids. He launched into funny stories about his teammates and told her how sometimes he wasn’t sure majoring in business was the right choice – confessing that deep down he still dreamed of playing in the NHL.

            “You still can. You’re only twenty and you're a really good player.”

            “You know how many college players get drafted?” He replied dejectedly, and it pulled at something deep inside her – a need she’d always had to make him feel better.

            “The statistics don’t matter.” Tessa stated firmly. “Not if you want it bad enough.”

            “Thanks, Tess.” Scott said with a soft smile.

            “Anytime.” She smiled back, patting him on his thigh. This was good. This was right. She felt like she could breathe again.

            “So… how are things going with TJ?” Scott asked after a few minutes, his hands gripping the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles had gone white. Tessa didn’t really want to discuss it with him – was surprised he’d even asked at all – but that was normal for friends, right? Friends talked about their relationships.

            “It’s going great. He’s great. How about you? Seeing anyone special?” She dreaded his response. Keeping her eyes on the passing cars, she held her breath as she waited to see what he was going to say. Attempting to steel her heart against the pain she knew was coming.

            “No. I, uh, actually haven’t gone out with anyone since the beginning of the school year.”

            Tessa’s head spun around so fast she nearly gave herself whiplash. “Nobody?” She asked, attempting to sound indifferent but utterly failing.

            “Nope.”

            “But… I thought… you seem to have no shortage of admirers.”

            Scott’s ears were tinged pink in embarrassment. “It comes with being on the team. Eric gets hit on by girls everywhere we go, even though most of them know he’s gay. I try to be friendly, but I never keep their numbers.”

            Tessa stared at him with wide eyes. How could she have misread him so terribly? She was almost tempted to ask _why_ he wasn’t seeing anyone, but she didn’t want to get her hopes up when it probably had nothing to do with her. “Oh… um… well… that’s good.”

            He finally looked over at her, a sparkle in his eyes that hadn’t been there before, “It is?”

            “Yes. I mean, if you want to not be dating, then you shouldn’t date. But if you want to, then you should. Whatever makes you happy. Happy is good.” Tessa stumbled over her words, feeling like a complete idiot at the way Scott was looking at her – his lips twitching as he tried to stop himself from laughing. Tessa knew that look well, it was one he’d often given her as kids when she started rambling and embarrassing herself.

            He finally managed to contain his reaction and set his mouth in a straight line. “Happy _is_ good.” He agreed with a nod, eyes still twinkling with quiet mirth.

            “I think it’s time to go over the flashcards again.” Tessa grabbed them and immediately fell into a line of intense questioning, hiding her burning cheeks behind the cards. The look in Scott’s eyes didn’t go away, even as he went along with her quizzing, and it set the butterflies in her stomach wild.

 

* * *

 

             Andrew’s condo was located on the East side of campus and was really incredibly nice. Two levels, two bedrooms, two bathrooms. It was also decently clean, considering it was occupied by two college guys. Some of the guys from the team had all gathered in his living room the weekend before Halloween to watch _Wait Until Dark_ and Kaitlyn had invited Tess to join them. Never able to resist a Hepburn movie, Tessa agreed to tag along.

            Andrew and Kaitlyn were cuddled up together on the loveseat, whispering quietly about something more than actually watching the movie. Andrew was running his hand slowly up and down Kaitlyn’s arm in a hypnotizing rhythm while they talked. Tessa couldn’t help but smile at how cute they were.

            Eric, Andrew's roommate, and his boyfriend, Luis, were sitting together on the giant bean bag – all tucked up and cuddling as well. Which left the couch for Scott and Tessa. She was grateful for the space – staying plastered to the armrest on her side and leaving the middle cushion empty between them.

            The movie got to the part where Roat breaks into Susy’s apartment to attack her, and Tessa screamed – launching herself into Scott and burying her face into his chest.

            He chuckled, the movement making her upper body bounce against his, and started stroking her back. “It’s okay.” He soothed, and she pulled away quickly – embarrassed.

            “Sorry. It’s been a long week and I didn’t realize how tense I was. It just took me by surprise.”

            “It’s fine, Tess. Come here.” He pulled her into his side, and she let him – wrapping her arms around his chest and snuggling in close. She told herself that it was totally platonic. Merely self-defense against the scary movie. It didn’t stop her brain from traitorously categorizing how muscular his body felt or how warm he was or the mixed scent of his cologne and something uniquely Scott.

            Kaitlyn caught her eye and smirked, but Tessa just turned up her nose and went back to watching the movie. Let Kaitlyn think what she wanted – some friendly cuddles didn’t mean anything.

 

* * *

  

            The University was throwing a big Monster Mash party at the Varsity stadium for Halloween. It was an annual tradition, and costumes were heavily encouraged. Officially, there was no alcohol allowed, but inevitably students brought flasks or spiked the punch and the night always turned into a massive crazy dance party.

            “You look stunning. What are you supposed to be?” Tessa asked Kaitlyn, who was applying a dramatic shade of red lipstick in the mirror. She was dressed in a beautiful ruby red dress with black lace trim and had done her hair up in an intricate knot with a big rose clipped in.

            “Andrew and I decided to be a flamenco dancer and a bullfighter. Just wait until you see his costume – it’s amazing.” Finished, Kaitlyn smacked her lips together and then turned around to face Tessa. “You look gorgeous!”

            Tessa blushed, feeling nervous. TJ had wanted to go as James Bond, and had convinced her to dress up as Vesper Lynd from Casino Royale. She had bought a floor-length black silk dress with thin straps and a big cut-out in the back, trying to match the movie, not realizing just how much of her breasts would be on display. “It’s not too… much?” She asked Kaitlyn self-consciously.

            “No way. Scott’s going to lose his mind.” Kaitlyn teased. “Oops! I mean TJ, of course.” She winked as Tessa scowled at her, not-amused. “Here, let me do your hair.”

            Tessa sat down obediently as Kaitlyn twisted her dark locks up into a beautiful chignon. Putting in the large costume jewelry diamond earrings she bought, she finished the look by applying some ruby red lipstick.

            “Ready?” Kaitlyn asked as she headed towards the door.

            “As I’ll ever be.” Tessa replied, giving herself a mental pep-talk. _You can do this. Confidence, Tessa._

 

            TJ was waiting for them in the lobby downstairs, eyes going wide at the sight of Tessa. It was immediately obvious in his expression, the heat in his eyes, that he liked the dress. It set Tessa's skin tingling in a pleasant way, even if she wasn't quite appreciative of how often his eyes dropped to her chest.

            “Wow. You look beautiful, Ms. Lynd.” He said, holding out his arm for her.

            “Thank you, Mr. Bond. You look quite dashing yourself.” Tessa replied, taking his arm and following him out of the building. He really did look very handsome in his black fitted tuxedo. The three of them took a taxi to the stadium, where Andrew was going to meet them outside.

            At first there was no sign of him, and then a man in a shimmering black and gold matador costume, complete with red silk cape, turned around from where he was talking to a group of guys. He spotted Kaitlyn in seconds and ran over to greet her with a warm kiss.

            “Buenas tardes mi cariño.”

            Kaitlyn grinned, “Have you been practicing?”

            “All day.” Andrew replied with a laugh. “I hope I said it right.”

            “It sounded perfect to me.” Kaitlyn said with a sappy grin. 

            Andrew lead them over to the group he’d been standing with – mostly hockey players – and Tessa began laughing so hard she thought she might suffocate at the sight of Scott.

            He was dressed as Robin from the classic 1960’s Batman that he’d loved to watch on Saturday mornings as a kid. The whole ensemble was a perfect replica, from the silky yellow cape to the green onesie and red vest and tights. He even had a black mask on and the green elf-shoes.

            “I can’t believe you chose that costume.” Tessa grinned in delight. It was wonderfully ridiculous. Kaitlyn was laughing right along with her, but TJ had gone stiff by her side, clearly not as amused.

            Scott though, seemed to be frozen – he’d initially turned towards them with a grin, but now something different covered his face, something darker, that had Tessa’s insides turning molten and sent her skin buzzing. He was looking her up and down in a way that set her on fire – heat flooding between her legs. Licking his lips, his eyes finally met hers and Tessa stopped laughing. She’d never seen Scott look at her like that before and it made her simultaneously want to kiss him senseless and run hide. The way Scott looked at her made her feel entirely different from the look TJ had given her earlier.  _That's because you don't want TJ_ her brain said traitorously, and Tessa stifled the thought guiltily. 

            TJ cleared his throat loudly, bringing both her and Scott back to the present. “Nice costume, man.” TJ said, his grip on Tessa’s waist tightening.

            “Thanks. You’re Bond, right? You guys look great.” He spoke to them both, but his eyes lingered on Tess, who could feel herself turning red under his gaze.

            “Yeah. James Bond and his Bond Girl.” TJ replied coolly, emphasizing the _his_ with a trace of possessiveness, before turning to face Tessa, stepping between her and Scott. “Let’s go inside, Tess.”

            Sensing that it would be better not to argue, Tessa agreed and bid the others farewell, following TJ to the dance floor.

           

            They danced all night, but there was a distance between them now that hadn’t been there before. When they parted ways back at her building with nothing more than a perfunctory kiss on the lips and a promise to call the next day, Tessa knew the writing was on the wall.


	6. Chapter 5: Long Way Home

           Tessa’s relationship lasted two more weeks before it became painfully obvious to both of them that it wasn’t going anywhere. She was supposed to meet TJ for coffee at Starbucks and knew that this would be the last time. Donning an ivory knit sweater and her favorite jeans, she walked to campus – the smell of coffee and baked goods hitting her as she walked through the door.

            TJ was already sitting at a table, his regular order of plain black coffee in front of him.  _So he hadn’t even waited for her_. That had to be a sign that he knew what was coming. Tessa went up to the counter, deciding on a hot chocolate instead of something caffeinated, and then joined TJ by the window.

            They sat in awkward silence and Tessa fiddled with her cup, trying to figure out what to say. She’d written down a whole speech the night before, but it didn’t seem right to read from a piece of paper when breaking up with someone, and so she’d left it at home. Now though, she wished she had it in front of her.

            “Just say it, Tess.” TJ finally spoke, sounding deflated.

            “I really like you, TJ.” She began, but stopped when he shot her a tired glare. “I think we should break up.” She hadn’t meant to just come out with it like that, she’d wanted to ease into it gently. But his mood said loud and clear that he just wanted the conversation to be over with.

            “Is this because of Scott?”

            “No!” Tessa replied, perhaps a bit too quickly, and TJ just arched a skeptic eyebrow at her.

            “Really. I just don’t think you and I are a match romantically, but I still like you as a friend.” She tried to take his hand, but he pulled back – leaning away from her and looking annoyed.

            “We could’ve been a good match, Tess, but it’s been clear from the beginning that your interest lay elsewhere.” Bitterness laced his tone, and Tessa felt guilty.

            “That’s not true. I was interested in you.”

            “Is Scott waiting for you right now? Ready to run off into the sunset?” He scoffed, and Tessa had never heard him sound like that before. If that was who he truly was, she was glad to be finding out now instead of months down the road, or (god forbid) after she’d slept with him.

            “No. And you’re being mean. Sometimes relationships just don’t work out.” She sat back as well, stiff and irritated.

            “Whatever, Tess. I’ll see you around.” He stood quickly, shaking the table a bit and spilling some coffee, and put his coat back on. With one last nod at her, he swept out of the shop, leaving her there to clean up the mess. Class was definitely going to be awkward now, and Tessa was grateful that they only had a couple of weeks left in the semester.

 

* * *

 

 

            “That’s it. I can’t let this go on any longer. You’re coming with us.” Kaitlyn looked up sharply at Tessa, who was lounging on her bed reading over her different course syllabi for the next semester.

            “What?” Tessa glanced at Kaitlyn, who had been busy most of the day packing for her getaway weekend with Andrew.

            “Skiing. There’s plenty of room in Andrew’s parent’s cabin.”

            “I’m not going to be your third wheel, Kait.” Tessa stated with an exaggerated eye-roll. Kaitlyn had been talking about her trip with Andrew for  _weeks_. Apparently his parents had a cabin up north by Antoine Mountain ski resort, and he’d convinced them to let him use it for an end-of-semester celebration with his girlfriend. (A fact that still astounded Tessa. Her parents would  _never_ ).

            “And  _I’m_  not going to leave you here alone to wallow in your break-up. Besides, Andrew told his parents he was taking his friends up there, so it helps our cover to have you along.” Tessa knew Kaitlyn was making that part up for her benefit, but didn’t call her out on it.

            “I’m not wallowing.” Tessa protested. And it was true – she was surprisingly okay with the whole break-up thing. Other than the awkwardness of seeing TJ in class and being in the study group with him, she didn’t feel any regret. They’d made it through the semester, and now that it was done she could rest easy knowing she didn’t have to see him again.

            “Whatever you say. The point is it’s the end of the semester and I’m not about to leave you behind in a half-empty residence hall eating ice cream out of the carton. You’re coming. Pack a bag.”

            “My parents expect me home this weekend.” Tessa continued to protest, but only half-heartedly. A mountain getaway did sound kind of fun, even if it was spent cuddled up in front of the fire with a good book while Kaitlyn and Andrew did their thing. “And I don’t know how to ski.”

            Sensing an imminent victory, Kaitlyn continued to press her. “You can build a snowman, for all I care. And they have a small ice rink there – I know you used to skate. I promise you’ll have fun.”

            “Geez. Fine.” Tessa huffed, getting up from off the bed and pulling out her suitcase.

            “Good!” Kaitlyn grinned – a little too satisfied with herself – and pulled out her phone to text Andrew.

 

            A couple hours and a phone call to her mom later, Tessa was walking out of the dorms with Kaitlyn, duffle bags in tow. Andrew had borrowed an SUV from one of his hockey buddies – some old grungy model that had seen better days, but was at least moderately clean on the inside – and he was parked out front waiting for them.

            “Hey Tess,” he greeted her after kissing Kaitlyn, “Glad you could come!”

            “Hey Andrew. Thanks for being cool about Kaitlyn inviting me.”

            He took both of their bags and threw them into the trunk with a casual, “Anytime.” And Tessa opened the passenger door – stopping when she saw Scott already inside.

            “Hi!” She started just as he said, “Tess!”

            “I didn’t know you were coming.” Tessa finished climbing in as Kaitlyn took her place in the front seat.

            “Oh yeah. Last minute thing. Andrew told me he was dragging me along this afternoon.” Scott shrugged. “I hope that’s okay?” He looked a little nervous, and Tessa rushed to reassure him.

            “God, of course. The more the merrier.” A quick glance at Kaitlyn’s smug face told her all she needed to know. Her dear friend was up to something and had looped Andrew in on whatever she was planning.

            “I made Tessa come so she’d stop wallowing over her break-up.” Kaitlyn chimed in, as Andrew shifted into gear and got them on the road – his quiet chuckle giving him away as  _definitely_  being in cahoots with Kaitlyn. Tessa could have throttled her best friend.

            “I told you I wasn’t wallowing.” Tessa argued as Scott turned to her.

            “You and TJ broke up?”

            “Yeah, a couple weeks ago.” Tessa told him quietly, really not wanting to have this conversation, especially not while stuck in a car for four hours, but it was unavoidable now.  _Thanks, Kait_  she thought mutinously.

            “Oh.” Scott started fiddling with a non-existent string on his jeans. “How come?”

            “We just weren’t a good match. It’s no big deal.” Tessa shrugged. “How about some music?”

            Taking pity on her, Kaitlyn popped in a cassette – the SUV only had a tape deck – and the sounds of the Spice Girls filled the car. Never feeling more grateful for Posh, Sporty, and the gang than in that moment, Tessa enthusiastically joined in – yelling “So tell me what you want, what you really, really want” with Kaitlyn as the boys laughed at them. Although it wasn’t long before Scott and Andrew were coerced into singing as well, much to the girls’ delight.

           

            They passed the time playing stupid road-trip games like searching for letters in the alphabet and “Would you rather?” – which led to some pretty funny answers. Like Tessa learning that Andrew would rather be chased by a hundred giant spiders than thousands of tiny ducks.

            “I don’t like ducks, okay?” Was his defensive reply as everyone laughed.

            “I’ve got a good one.” Kaitlyn said through the laughter. “Tessa, would you rather have a million dollars, or kiss Scott?”

            The laughter died in Tessa’s throat as she turned bright red. She couldn’t bring herself to look at Scott and see his reaction – which she was sure would be a mixture of discomfort and pity.

            “Z!” She shouted instead, saved by a passing billboard. “I win the alphabet game! Ha!”

            Scott came to her rescue, for which she was endlessly appreciative, if a little mortified, “Good job, T! Hey Andrew, I brought a mixtape – mind putting it in?”

            Andrew took it from him, “Sure thing.” And there was palpable sense of relief as the car was filled with Queen’s “Don’t Stop Me Now.”

            Tessa leaned her head against the window and let the gentle rocking of the car lull her to sleep in an attempt to escape her own embarrassment. She and Kaitlyn would be having  _words_  later.

 

            She didn’t wake up until they pulled up to the cabin. Night had fallen, and the snowy pine trees were drenched in moonlight, giving the landscape an ethereal look. The cabin itself was quite large, made entirely of wood, with a peaked floor-to-ceiling window taking up most of one side.

            The inside was just as wooden and rustic as the outside. Clearly the Poje’s took the mountain theme seriously. But the warm color schemes and mix of leather furniture and fur blankets made the whole place feel cozy and inviting.

            “Kait and I are in the master bedroom over there.” Andrew pointed, giving them the tour. “You and Scott are in those rooms. I’m sorry you’ll have to share a bathroom.”

            Tessa followed where he had pointed, discovering two bedrooms with log bunkbeds -  situated next to each other with a connecting bathroom. “This’ll be great, Andrew. Thanks.” Scott said next to her and Tessa nodded. It was already pretty late so they all agreed to head to bed and get an early start in the morning.

            “You’re going skiing?” Scott asked, sounding a little surprised, as they brushed their teeth.

            “No.” Tessa huffed out a laugh. “I’ll probably just stay here and read.”

            “Andrew said there’s an ice rink.” Scott started, hesitating a little. “We could go?”

            Tessa smiled a little, “Maybe. Goodnight, Scott.” She turned and went quickly back into her room – needing some space. She had not anticipated seeing him this weekend, and being in close proximity was doing funny things to her insides.

 

            True to her word, the next day Tessa stayed at the cabin while the rest of them went skiing. They’d all tried to convince her to tag along and she had kindly, but firmly, declined. She needed the alone-time to decompress.

            They’d loaded up on groceries in the last town, so Tessa popped a couple of frozen pizzas into the oven to have ready when everyone got back. They spent the night relaxing and watching old Christmas movies on VHS that Andrew found in the basement.

            When Kaitlyn got up to use the bathroom, Tessa followed her – taking the opportunity to confront her friend.

            “Did you plan this?” She wasted no time getting to the point.

            “Plan what?” Kaitlyn asked, looking entirely too innocent.

            “You know what. This weekend – with Scott.” Tessa folded her arms and leaned against the doorway, blocking Kaitlyn’s exit, and waiting for an explanation.

            “So what if I did? You guys need a little push.”

            “No. What we need is for you to stop trying to make something happen that isn’t going to.” Tessa chastised, utterly convinced in what she was saying.

            “Ugh. Tess, you are so blind to what’s right in front of you. I’m doing you a favor. Andrew agrees with me, by the way, and he’s one of Scott’s best friends so…” She shrugged and forced her way past Tessa to rejoin the boys.

           

 

            The next morning Tessa slept in, assuming that everyone would head to the slopes without her. When she finally crawled out of bed, baggy t-shirt slipping off her shoulder and hair still tangled from sleep, and walked into the kitchen she was shocked to see Scott sitting on the couch, reading a book and sipping on some coffee.

            “Good morning.” She said awkwardly, cursing herself for not checking her appearance before leaving her room and tugging her shirt down to try and cover the Marvin the Martian pajamas shorts she was wearing.

            “Hey.” Scott said, a slow smile spreading across his face as he took in her appearance. “Cute.” He nodded at her shorts and she blushed.

            She finished her walk into the kitchen, grabbing the box of Cocoa Puffs off the shelf. “Um… what are you doing here?”

            Scott hopped up off the couch to join her at the kitchen counter. Leaning casually against it and looking entirely too good for a Sunday morning. “Waiting for you.”

            “Why?”

            “We’re going ice skating.”

            She started to protest, but he stopped her by covering her mouth with his hand – laughing when she bit it in retaliation. “Stop arguing, T. It’ll be fun, I promise. We can bust out some old routines.”

            “Aren’t you tired of skating? I mean, it’s like your job.”

            “No. And I haven’t skated with  _you_  in a long time. I miss it.” He was looking at her so hopefully that she couldn’t bring herself to disappoint him.

            “Okay.” She finally gave in, and Scott made a whooping noise and scooped her up in a hug. He quickly put her back down though, cheeks turning pink, as it was blatantly obvious that she wasn’t wearing a bra.

            “Great, uh… I’m gonna go… brush my teeth. Let me know when you’re ready to go.” He turned and walked away quickly, and Tessa knew she was going to be haunted by the feeling of his chest against hers, even through layers of fabric, for a long time.

 

            They headed over to the rink after Tessa had thrown on some leggings and a warm hoodie (and a bra, thankfully), and rented some skates. They didn’t have figure skates for men, so Scott had to guess at a size in women’s as Tessa laughed.

            “It’s such a stupid stereotype. That men want hockey skates and girls figure skates.” He grumbled as he sat by her side, lacing them up tight. Tessa privately agreed with him.

            They walked over to the rink, and Tessa had to get used to the feeling of being on skates again. The weird press of the blade down the center of her foot and the elevated height. When they reached the edge of the ice she eyed it warily. Sensing her hesitance, Scott held out his hand. “Come on. It’s like riding a bike.”

            She felt a little selfish, but she really wanted to hold his hand again, and so she took it and let him pull her onto the ice. Wobbling, she reached out and clutched his shoulders tightly.

            “I got you, I got you.” Scott steadied her, and when she finally felt stable and looked up at him, she sucked in a quick breath at how close he was. She could make out all of the different flecks of color in his eyes.

            “I’m ready now.” Tessa finally said after they had been staring at each other for what felt like hours but was probably only a few seconds. Scott nodded and began leading her slowly around the edge of the rink while she got used to skating again.

            He was right – it was like riding a bike. After a few times around she felt confident enough to let go of his hand and start picking up speed. Scott followed her around, content to let her take the lead.

            But after a few minutes he caught up to her and took her hand again. “Ready?” He asked with a sly grin.

            “For what?” Tessa asked, confused.

            “To dance!” He laughed at her expression and started guiding her through some of their basic dance steps from when they were kids.

            “I don’t think I remember.” Tessa tried to excuse herself, but it hadn’t been  _that_  many years, and muscle memory took over. Before long Scott had roped her into recreating some of their exhibition gala dance from the 2004 Canadian Junior Nationals. Their last competition together before he’d decided to pursue hockey and she’d had to quit because of the pain in her legs.

            The familiar twists and turns, the feeling of having him close like that again, sent her heart racing. He even convinced her to try some of the simpler lifts. Tessa could almost hear the jazzy tones of the rock medley they’d chosen that year echoing in her ears. Everywhere he touched her sent a trail of fire across her skin. By the time they finished, they were both breathing heavily.

            “We really had something, eh?” Scott grinned at her, his eyes crinkling and his hand still in hers.

            “Yeah. I wonder what would have happened if we’d continued.”

            “Maybe in another life we’re Olympic champions.” Scott teased as he lead her off the ice. Tessa laughed.

            “Yeah, maybe we are.”

           

            They had burgers for lunch in the little café there, splitting a massive plate of fries, before heading back to the cabin. Tessa was feeling lighter than she had in months. This had been better than any date she’d ever had with TJ. Probably an unfair thought, but true nonetheless.

            But this wasn’t a date, it was just two friends spending time together. She couldn’t afford to get swept up in the moment  _again_.

            When they got back to the cabin, Andrew and Kaitlyn were there and the four of them spent the afternoon building snowmen and having a snowball fight.

            Overall it was a perfect weekend.

  

\-----------------

 

            “Fuck,” Andrew said, “I don’t think we can keep going.” The snow was lashing the windshield violently, reducing their visibility to practically zero. Andrew’s hands were gripping the steering wheel so tightly his knuckles had turned white. The weather had seemed fine when they first left, just a few flakes falling here and there, but after an hour it had quickly turned treacherous.

            “Where are we right now?” Andrew asked, sounding stressed.

            “We just passed a sign for Arrowhead Provincial Park.” Scott chimed in.

            “We still have at least two hours, and that’s in good weather.” Andrew groaned, muttering another curse word. “We should stop and finish in the morning.”

            “Yeah, I think that's a good idea.” Kaitlyn said, and Scott and Tessa hummed in agreement from the back seat.

            “Okay. Keep an eye out for the exits. Next one with a hotel or something, we’ll pull over.”

            The three of them kept their eyes glued to the road signs, while Andrew focused on not crashing, and as soon as they saw a battered billboard for the Arrowhead Inn, they pulled off the freeway.

            They weren’t the only ones too scared to drive, apparently, as the parking lot was nearly full – even though the inn looked like it had seen better days.

            “This place looks kind of scary." Kaitlyn complained. 

            “Hey, it’s better than driving.” Andrew said, leading them all through the front doors and into the little lobby. An elderly lady was seated behind the desk and smiled at them kindly over her thick-rimmed glasses as they walked in.

            “You’re in luck. We have two rooms left.” She told them, running Andrew’s credit card and handing over two sets of keycards.

            They grabbed their bags out of the car and made their way to their rooms, which were thankfully right next door to each other. Tessa’s feelings of gratitude evaporated as soon as she saw the beds though. Or rather, bed – singular. Each room only had a single queen bed.

            Before she had a chance to say anything, Kaitlyn was pulling her aside.

            “Okay, before you say anything I know this sucks, but please let me share with Andrew.”

            “ _Kaitlyn_.” Tessa complained. “You can’t be serious.”

            “I swear this wasn’t on purpose, Tess. But come on,  _please_.” Kaitlyn was giving her her best pleading look, the one she knew Tessa couldn’t resist, and she didn’t really want to seem like she was making a big deal out of it, so Tessa gave in.

            With an exasperated sigh and a glance at Scott, who was studiously avoiding looking at them, she nodded at Kaitlyn. “Alright, fine. But you owe me BIG.”

            “Done. Whatever you want is yours. Thank you, thank you!” With a little squeeze of Tessa’s arm she ran back to Andrew, smiling widely at him. Scott glanced at Tessa as she walked back over, eyes wide in surprise, but she avoided his questioning gaze.

            “Try not to be too loud tonight guys, we’re right next door.” Tessa teased awkwardly as Andrew and Kait disappeared into their room, with Kaitlyn tossing back, “No promises!”

            Tessa finally turned to see Scott still watching her, hands shoved deep in his pockets.

            “Well, should we?”

            “What?” His voice came out higher than normal and Tessa squinted at him, confused, and gestured to the door behind him.

            “Go inside.”

            “Oh! Yeah. Yeah.” He pulled the key card out of his pocket, nearly dropping it in his haste.

           

            The room was small and sparse, but not awful. At least it looked clean. Tessa threw her bag down on the little table.

            “They probably have a cot or something, I can-“

            “It’s a big bed, Scott.” Tessa said before she had a chance to think it over. “We can share. It’s not a big deal.”

            Scott licked his lips. “Yeah, I guess."

            "Do you want to use the bathroom first?" Tessa asked, gesturing to the door across the room.

            “No. I want to call my mom and let her know where we are – I think we have service here. She might be able to tell me what the weather forecast is.”

            Tessa took in his appearance – the awkward way he was standing and his grimace. He probably wanted to be alone, and so she grabbed her pajamas and toiletries out of her bag and headed into the bathroom. The room was cheap and the sleeping conditions less than ideal, but Tessa was glad to be off the road in such bad weather.

            Staring at the mirror, she gave herself a little mental pep talk. “You can do this, Tess. It’s just one night. It doesn’t mean anything. You're just friends.” She took a deep breath and pushed the door open before she lost her nerve and ended up hiding in the bathroom all night. Although, maybe the bathtub wouldn't be a bad alternative if things became too unbearable awkward.

            “It’s all yours!” Her voice came out light and cheery – and if it shook a little, Scott didn’t seem to notice.

             “Thanks. I got through to my mom – she said the weather’s supposed to clear up by the morning.”

            “That’s good.” He moved past her, pajamas in tow, and Tessa plugged her phone into the charger before climbing into the bed. Now that she was in it, it suddenly seemed much smaller. She gulped loudly.

            It wasn’t that she didn’t  _want_  to share a bed with Scott, per se, but these were less than ideal circumstances. They were platonic, for one, and that made her more nervous than if they’d been otherwise. She just knew she was going to be paranoid all night about accidentally bumping into him.

            When he reemerged, Tessa had pulled the blanket up high on her lap and had pulled out her copy of  _The Hunger Games_ , hoping that it would make her seem calm and casual. She tried to ignore the way his white t-shirt rode up when he bent over to put his clothes back in his bag, and the fact that he was only wearing boxer shorts – not pajama pants.

            He climbed into the bed next to her and Tessa had to fight the rising urge to scoot over and snuggle into him. Just as he got settled, they heard a noise from the room next door, followed by a loud moan. Apparently Kaitlyn and Andrew weren’t intending to keep quiet.

            It probably shouldn’t have been a surprise, Kaitlyn and Andrew had made no secret about wanting to share a bedroom, but it hadn’t occurred to Tessa that she and Scott would actually be able to hear them. The moans were soon accompanied by the rhythmic creaking of bed springs, and Scott practically shouted, “TV?” as he scrambled for the remote.

            “Absolutely!” Tessa agreed quickly, setting down her book and sitting up.

            The TV was an old and crappy model, and it took Scott switching between a few static channels before he finally found something they could watch. It turned out to be a station that played movies, and that night Moulin Rouge was on.

            “I love this movie.” Tessa couldn’t help but comment, and Scott smiled at her, looking marginally less uncomfortable now that they couldn’t hear their friends quite as clearly.

            “Me too.”

            But the movie quickly turned out to be a mistake – it distracted from the sounds next door, but only because of the scenes of lovemaking on the screen. Tessa could feel her whole body growing hot and knew her face must be bright red. She dared to glance over at Scott, whose own neck had gone pink and his hands were making fists in the pillow that he’d pulled over his lap.

            “Turn it off.” She blurted out.

            “What?”

            “I mean, I’m tired. Can we just go to sleep?”

            “Sure, kiddo.”

            The old nickname did the trick – effectively dousing any building desire. Tessa rolled onto her side away from him, pulling the blanket up to her neck. She could feel Scott shuffling around, getting comfortable behind her. Thankfully, Andrew and Kaitlyn seemed to have …  _finished…_  so the room was left blanketed in silence.

            “G’night, Tess.” Scott whispered into the dark.

            “Goodnight.” She whispered back. She could tell that he fell asleep quickly, his breathing deepening – like he’d always been able to do when they were kids – but Tessa’s restless mind fought it for a while, until it had no choice but to succumb to her exhaustion.

 

            It was hot. Too hot. Tessa blinked to awareness, taking in the still dark bedroom. She couldn’t have been asleep for very long. With her increasing awareness came the realization of  _why_  she was so hot.

            In his sleep Scott had wrapped himself around her – his face was nuzzled into the back of her neck, his hand had come to rest on her stomach where her shirt had ridden up during the night, and his legs were entwined with hers. He was still breathing deeply, clearly asleep and blissfully unaware of their current situation.

            Honestly, it felt kind of nice, and Tessa was tempted to stay there and let herself fall back asleep – but the prospect of Scott finding them like this in the morning was mortifying. He would not be happy.

            Slowly, she began trying to untangle herself – intent on getting out and moving around to the other side of the bed – but as soon as she shifted his hand on her stomach tightened and he made a little noise of protest, nuzzling closer into her neck.

            Heart pounding, Tessa stopped moving immediately. She held her breath, waiting to see what he would do, but after a moment he just relaxed again.

            She waited a little bit longer before trying again, scooting forward with her hips, which was a mistake. His own hips surged forward into her ass and he mumbled, “Tess.”

            Her cheeks flamed. This was probably going to both haunt her and fuel her fantasies  _forever_. She could feel him growing hard against her, and his hand was gripping her tightly on her lower stomach. She could feel herself growing increasingly wet as she laid there, trying to decide what to do.

            It had to be a mistake. She knew he’d dated a girl named Jessica – maybe she had heard him wrong and what he’d really said was “Jess.” That would make way more sense.

            Desperate to move now and unwilling to be part of some wet dream about his ex-girlfriend, Tessa scooted forward again, teetering on the edge of the mattress.

            “ _Tessa_.” The way he said her name sent heat shooting through her core. There was definitely no mistaking it that time, and Tessa gasped.

 

            Then promptly fell off the bed with a loud thump.

 

            “Ow.” She grumbled – no real harm done, but pride severely wounded.

            “Tess?” Scott’s groggy voice called out from above her, and she watched from her spot on the floor as he leaned over the bed to look down at her. “What are you doing down there?”

             _Well, you started grinding on me and I panicked_  – was what she wanted to say, but instead she said, “You accidentally knocked me off.” She pushed herself up to stand, rubbing her bruised elbow.

            “I did?” He scrambled to sit up, moving back to his side of the bed, “I’m so sorry! Are you okay?”

            “I’m fine. Just a bump.” She reassured him as she got back in the bed, trying to pretend like everything was normal.

            “Are you sure?” He sounded so guilty and apologetic, impulsively she reached out and gave his hand a gentle squeeze.

            “Really, Scotty, I’m okay.” She moved to withdraw, but he grabbed onto her fingers – trapping her hand in his.

            “You haven’t called me that in a long time.”

            He sounded suddenly vulnerable. In the dark she could barely make out his features, but she could see that his face was tilted down, staring at their joined hands.

            “It just slipped out.” She didn’t know why she was whispering – only that suddenly her stomach was full of butterflies and she could feel her fight or flight response kicking in. Tessa liked control. Structure. And knowing what to expect. Since Scott’s return to her life, she’d been constantly knocked off center.

            “What happened to us, Tess?” The dark was making him bold, although he was whispering too. He still held tightly to her hand, refusing to let go.

            She couldn’t handle this conversation right now – not sitting in bed together in the middle of the night, with him so close and having moaned her name in a way she’d hardly ever dared to imagine only moments ago. She pulled her hand out of his and answered flippantly, “You went away to school. It happens.”

            “No, it’s more than that. I know it is.” Apparently he wasn’t going to let this go.

            Tessa sat quietly, contemplating her next choice of words very carefully. “I had a crush on you. It was silly, but it seemed like a big deal at the time. And you didn’t like me back,  _which is fine_ ,” She hastened to add, “It just took me a while to get over it. But I did. I’m ready to be friends again now.”

            He didn’t say anything for a moment, and then asked carefully, “You mean the night before my graduation?”

            “Yeah.” Tessa muttered, barely audible.

            “Tess, I never meant… It wasn’t a  _rejection_. To be honest, I panicked. But it wasn’t about you.” She could tell he was running his hand through his hair nervously and her heart felt like it was in her throat. “I’d liked you, as more than a friend, for a while. But I didn’t think I was supposed to. I mean, you were little Tutu – we’d grown up together and been skating partners and my brothers had warned me that if I ever touched you inappropriately they’d break my hands.” He chuckled and Tessa couldn’t help but laugh too, even though she was having a hard time comprehending what he was even saying.

            “You kissed me, and it was everything I’d ever wanted, but I didn’t think I was  _supposed_ to want it, so I pushed you away with some bullshit about you being my little sister.”

            “Oh.” Was all she could manage to say. Her whole world felt like it had been flipped upside down. In all her agonizing over that night, none of this had never been an option that occurred to her.

            “Yeah.” He huffed out another laugh. “I’m glad you’re ready to be friends again. Not being friends with you fucking  _sucked_.” He reached out and took her hand again, and she let him.

            “Yeah, it really did. I’m sorry.”

            “I’m sorry too. Let’s never do that again, okay? Next time there’s something going on, let’s just agree to be honest with each other.”

            Tessa nodded, and then realized that he couldn’t see her. “Okay.” She whispered. Was now the time to mention that she maybe, possibly, kind of still loved him? Before she could work up the nerve he’d already slid back down into the bed, and she followed suit.

            “Goodnight. Again.” He said with a laugh, keeping their fingers interlocked.

            Tessa couldn’t help the grin that spread across her face. “Goodnight.”      

            Things would be different now, but for once Tessa felt like things were changing for the better between them. She fell back asleep quickly – finally at ease in a way that she hadn’t been in months.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for your comments! Reading them is seriously the highlight of my day. <3


	7. Chapter 6: Say When

 

            Tessa was really trying hard not to be annoyed. She had her headphones in, her favorite study playlist cranked up to an almost deafening level, a copy of her anthropology textbook splayed open with a notebook nearby, and she was hunched over at her desk decidedly _not_ turning around, but it was no use. The giggles and sounds of making-out going on behind her were just too loud.

            “Okay, that’s it.” She ripped her headphones off and stood up.

            “Sorry, Tess.” Kaitlyn said from where she was laying on her bed, not sounding apologetic at all, as Andrew said sorry as well.

            “I’m going to study somewhere else.” Grabbing her backpack, Tessa threw her supplies inside it and took off out of her dorm room in search of somewhere _not_ occupied by lovebirds.

 

            How she ended up standing outside Scott’s room a few blocks away, she wasn’t sure. She only knew that she wanted to vent about the situation, and needed someone to listen.

            “Scott! Our friends are driving me crazy!” She banged on his door, probably annoying everyone else on that floor, but she didn’t care.

            “Scott-“

            The door swung open and she was left standing with her fist hanging awkwardly mid-air. An annoyed, dark-haired guy was standing across from her, an eyebrow raised as he waited for an explanation.

            “Oh my god. I am so sorry. I was looking for-“

            “Scott. Yeah, I heard.” His face relaxed and he chuckled, stepping to the side to let her in. “He’s in the shower.”

            “Thanks.” She ducked her head in embarrassment as she walked into the room. “I’m T-“

            “Tessa. I know. I recognize you from Scott’s pictures. I’m Patrick.”

            “Pictures?” She looked at him in confusion. He gestured to a large corkboard on the wall across the room, next to what must have been Scott’s bed. Tessa couldn’t resist walking over and looking at it.

            The board was covered edge-to-edge with photos: pictures of Scott’s family, his hockey team and action shots from games, photos with friends, and scattered throughout the whole thing were images her.

            Some of them were group photos with their families, but most of them were shots of just the two of them. Pictures from their competitions, trips to the zoo and amusement park, and even the stiff, awkward photo they’d posed for at his graduation.

            “Wow.” She whispered, reaching up to gently touch one of the photos. It was one that she hadn’t seen before of her and Scott laying side-by-side in a hammock – her hair was pulled back into two French braids, her face scattered with freckles. She remembered the day it was taken – their families had rented a cabin on Lake Huron. Tessa had been barely fifteen and Scott was almost seventeen and heading into his senior year.

            He had pulled her into the hammock, despite her protests that they wouldn’t both fit, and used his leg to swing them back and forth while they talked about everything and nothing. That was the first time she’d thought she might be in love with him – very conscious of the way their adolescent bodies were pressed together.

            His mom must have taken the picture at some point – Alma had been obsessed with documenting the whole vacation. She and Scott were laughing, looking carefree and happy. 

            “Tess! Hi.”

            She spun around at the sound of Scott’s voice – completely taken off guard by the sight of him in only a towel, slung low around his hips. She couldn’t seem to stop her eyes from following the droplets of water on his shoulders as they ran down his chest and surprisingly defined abs, disappearing into the fabric below.

            “Scott, Tessa’s here.” Patrick said casually, not even bothering to look up from his homework.

            “Yeah, thanks man.” Scott rolled his eyes, his cheeks tinged pink. "You could have said something sooner." 

            "And ruin the surprise? I don't think so." Patrick said, the tone in his voice implying some sort of inside joke. 

            “Pants!” Tessa blurted out. “Uh… you should put some on. I’ll just… turn around.” She slapped a hand over her eyes and turned back around to face the wall, listening to the sounds of Scott’s shy laughter as he got dressed behind her. She was trying hard not to imagine what he looked like and to keep her breathing even.

            “All good.” He said after a moment, and she turned to find him dressed in jeans and a simple white t-shirt. The ensemble looked better than it had any right to.

            “To what do I owe the honor?” He smiled as he ran the towel through his hair – which was all wonky and fluffy and endearing. She wanted to run her hands through it, and maybe give it a tug.

            She blinked at him, trying to remember how to form words.

            “Your reason for visiting?” He prodded gently. “Not that you need a reason. I’m always happy to see you.” He hastened to add, and Patrick huffed out a laugh from where he was pretending to read. Scott hit him on the back of the head.

            Tessa gave herself a mental shake and remembered why she had come over in the first place. “Your _teammate_ is causing a real problem. I’ve been kicked out of my room.”

            Scott laughed at her disgruntled expression. “You can hang out here until the coast is clear.”

 

            They ended up sitting on his bed while Patrick sat on the floor in front of them - the three of them playing Mario Kart on Scott’s Xbox. A giant bowl of popcorn was passed around, and Scott pulled a pint of chocolate ice cream out of the mini fridge for Tess.

            “Take that, Moir!” Tessa yelled as she hit him with a red shell, moving into first place.

            “Oh you’re _dead_ , Virtue!”

            They had taken to physically shoving each other and sabotaging each other’s controllers in an attempt to win – their natural competitiveness breaking through.

            “You guys are crazy.” Patrick laughed at them from below. Content to place third – not even trying to get involved in their intense battle.

            “Hey what are you doing on Thursday?” Scott asked as he knocked her arm, causing her to go off course.

            “Uh… going to class?” Tessa was distracted – only half-concentrating on what he was saying – determined to beat him at the game. Passing him again, she laughed, “Come on, Scotty, it’s like you’re not even trying!”

            He instantly stopped talking and they battled it out – Tessa barely beating him to first place by a hair. She started doing a little dorky happy dance on the bed, raising her hands in the air in triumph, as Scott laughed at her. In that moment, Tessa felt completely happy.

            Sometimes there was a palpable sense of _anticipation_ when she was with Scott – a sense that they were moving towards _something_. But she was content to wait and let it develop naturally – afraid to rush it and make a wrong move.

            They had spent time together over Christmas break, and saw each other regularly now that classes had resumed, but it was all strictly platonic. Well, mostly platonic. Tessa couldn’t help the occasional lingering gaze. And she had spent more than a few nights quietly touching herself to thoughts of him - a secret she would take to her grave.

            “More ice cream, please.” She held out her empty bowl, grinning like a kid.

            “Sure thing, T. Coming right up.” He hopped up and retrieved it for her. “So you’re not doing anything for Valentine’s Day?” He asked, his back to her while he scooped the ice cream.

            Tessa laughed at the absurd idea. “No. Who would I be doing anything with?” She chuckled, accepting the bowl as he sat back down, but then stopped as worry seeped in. “Why? Are you doing something?” She asked suspiciously, wondering if he had a date and was trying to let her know. She wasn’t sure how she would react to that kind of news - probably poorly.

            “Bar Plus is doing an anti-Valentine’s day party and karaoke night. I thought we could get dressed up, grab some burgers, and go. A real topsy-turvy celebration.” He shrugged casually and Tessa was tempted to ask if it was a date, but she didn’t want to jinx it.

            "Sure. Sounds like fun." 

             

\--------------

 

            “It sounds like a date to me.” Kaitlyn was getting dressed for her evening with Andrew – putting on a slinky red dress and some killer heels.

            “But he hasn’t _said_ it’s a date.” Tessa reminded her, stepping into her own dress. An emerald green strappy knee-length dress that Kaitlyn promised made her eyes pop. “He specifically said it was _anti_ Valentine’s. Which would imply not being a date.”

            “I don’t know, Tess. Maybe he was just using that as cover in case you rejected him.”

            Tessa was saved from answering by a knock on the door. Kaitlyn smoothed the bottom of her dress before walking over and opening it, revealing Andrew on the other side. He looked very handsome in his dark suit, and the warm appreciation in his eyes when he saw Kaitlyn made it obvious that he was utterly besotted with her. Tessa couldn’t help but smile at them as they gave each other sappy looks in the doorway.

            “Wow. Kaitlyn, you look absolutely beautiful.” His voice came out breathy, and Tessa quietly wondered if they would even make it to dinner or just head straight for _dessert_.

            “Thank you. You look very handsome.” He helped her with her coat and she took his arm, yelling back at Tessa, “Don’t wait up!”

 

            Scott arrived a few minutes later, looking quite dashing in his dark suite and crisp white shirt. He gave her a big grin when she opened the door and she smiled back – certain that they looked like lunatics standing in the doorway grinning at each other, but not really caring.

            “You ready, T? You look great. That color really makes your eyes go _kapow!_ ” He made little exploding motions with his hands, and Tessa laughed.

            When his arms moved like that it pulled his unbuttoned jacket apart, and her brain nearly exploded. “Are you wearing  _suspenders_?” Oh boy – that was definitely going to fuel her fantasies for weeks.

            “Yep! The lady at the suit store said it completed the ensemble.” He looped his thumbs through them near his waist, stretching them out and letting them snap back. A motion Tessa instantly wanted to do herself. Preferably followed by unbuttoning his pants and having her way with him.

            “It’s a good look.” Her voice came out a little huskier than she’d intended, and Scott’s eyes grew dark.

            “We should go.” Tessa managed to say, her skin tingling all over from the way he was looking at her. He nodded and took her hand, leading her out of the room.

 

            True to his word, they stopped at a greasy burger joint on the way to the bar. It wasn’t much to look at from the outside, but the burgers were fat and delicious and the fries were the best she’d ever had. The laid back environment also helped to quiet her nerves, and she was able to relax and just enjoy being with Scott – whether it was a date or not.

            They walked to the bar, sharing old jokes and talking about their new classes. They didn’t have any together this semester, which was unfortunate but not a surprise since they were in such different majors.

            Bar Plus had really gone all out with the Anti-Valentine’s Day theme. When they walked in they were greeted by a giant sign that said “Love Bites” and there was a special drink menu posted on the wall with cocktails like “Black Heart” and “Loveless.”

            Scott ordered a simple beer for himself and a coke for Tessa and then led her over to a seat near the stage. Normally Tessa hated karaoke, but she didn’t mind watching other people do it – and it was fun to see how into it Scott was, tapping his foot and nodding his head – sometimes mouthing the words with the singers.

            A group of drunk girls sang an off-key rendition of Beyonce’s new song, “All the Single Ladies,” and Tessa full-on belly laughed when a bunch of college guys sang “Bye Bye Bye” by Nsync – complete with choreography.

            After a little while Scott got up to order another beer, and when he returned he seemed to be full of nervous energy.

            “Are you okay?” Tessa leaned over, forced to whisper directly into his ear so that he could hear her.

            “Just peachy!” His lips brushed her ear as he whispered back, sending shivers down her spine.

            Soon the MC was calling out the name of the next performer, and Tessa almost spit out her drink when she heard him say Scott’s name. Turning to look at him in shock, Scott merely threw her a smirk and then walked up to the stage.

            Moments later the beginning notes of “Gangster’s Paradise” began to play and Tessa burst out laughing. Watching Scott completely give himself over to the music – rapping his heart out – was the funniest thing she had ever seen and a completely unexpected side of him.

            When he finished, to a rousing round of applause, he walked over and scooped her up into a big hug, grinning from ear to ear. “Well, how’d I do, T?”

            “Amazing! The best imitation of Coolio I’ve ever heard.” She teased, giggling at how happy he was.

            A few more singers performed, and then Tessa heard Scott’s name being called out again, but this time in conjunction with hers.

            “No.” She said immediately, shaking her head vigorously.

            “Come on.” Scott said, tugging at her hand and giving her his best puppy-dog eyes. “What’s the point of coming to karaoke if you don’t sing?”

            “The point is not dying of humiliation.” Tessa said very seriously. Scott wouldn’t take no for an answer though.

            “If you do this with me, I’ll give you a foot massage every weekend for the rest of the semester.”

            Sensing that he wasn’t going to give up, and seeing the audience watching them with growing impatience, Tessa gave him a little nod. Scott punched the air and pulled her onto the stage, gesturing for the MC to begin the music that he had picked.

            The electronic keys and drumbeat began, and Tessa couldn’t help her relieved smile as she recognized the familiar notes. He’d picked “You Make My Dreams Come True” just for her – knowing that she would want something familiar to sing.

            She let herself get into the music, trying not to blush at the way Scott was completely focused on her – singing as if he’d written the words himself:  _“I’ve been waiting for, waiting for you girl, oh yeah. You make my dreams come true.”_

            Tessa could almost believe he meant it.

           

            “That wasn’t so bad, was it?” Scott asked as they walked up the street back towards her apartment, nudging her with his shoulder.

            “I guess not.” Tessa acquiesced, nudging him back. 

            When they reached her residence hall he walked her upstairs and to her door, making quiet small-talk as they went.

            “Thanks for coming along tonight, Tess.”

            “Thank you for inviting me. I had a lot of fun.”

            “We should do it again some time.” He sounded tentatively hopeful, and Tessa wondered if he meant as a date. _Did he want to date her?_ She certainly hoped so.

            “Absolutely. All you have to do is ask and I’m there.” She turned to wish him goodnight, and his intended cheek-kiss landed on the corner of her mouth - surprising them both. Instead of pulling away though, he let his lips linger – softly pressing them against her again before slowly leaning back.

            He was looking at her so softly, his hand coming up to caress her cheek, and Tessa desperately wanted to say something – like “I love you, do you want to come inside and make-out?” But instead she just kept quiet, smiling at him and leaning a little into his hand.

            “Noted.” He kept his hand on her cheek as he leaned in, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. When he pulled back he whispered, “Gorgeous green” to himself - so quietly she almost wasn’t sure she heard him. Before she could react with more than heavy breathing and a wide-eyed stare, he was saying goodnight and walking away.

            She let herself into her room, leaning against the door after closing it. _Did that just happen? Is this happening?_ She reached up to touch the corner of her lips where his had been. “Oh my god.”


	8. Chapter 7: Undeniable You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter gets explicit towards the end.

            “I’m so excited for the school year to be over.” Patrick threw himself down on the couch dramatically, nearly landing on Tessa in the process.

            “Only a couple more weeks.” She patted his head sympathetically and he closed his eyes, leaning into her touch. They’d grown to be pretty good friends since February. Tessa had been spending more time with Scott, and since he and Patrick were roommates the other boy often joined in. Tessa didn’t mind – he was really easy going and fun to be around.  

            The sound of a throat clearing made Tessa look up – Scott was standing here holding two plates of pizza and eyeing Patrick expectantly.

            “That’s my seat.”

            Patrick gave him a cheeky smile before moving out of the way so that Scott could sit by Tessa. He sat a little closer than necessary, but Tessa wasn’t about to complain - enjoying the warmth of the side of his body pressed against hers.

            “Here you go, T. Green peppers – just how you like it.”

            “Thank you.” She smiled, taking the plate from him. He had a couple of slices of combination pizza on his own plate - his favorite. 

            They had gathered at Andrew’s condo for dinner and movie night, which had become a weekly tradition and chance for them all to unwind from what felt like an abnormally difficult semester.

            Tessa had been struggling with her anthropology class, and would be very grateful when the day came that she could close her textbook and never have to open it again.

            Everyone gradually took their seats after filling up their plates, and Tessa nearly choked on the bite she had taken when Scott casually looped his arm around her shoulder, resting his hand on the back of her neck.

           It sent goosebumps all across her skin, but she tried to remain unaffected. He had been doing this more and more often recently – little touches, kissing her cheek when they said hello or goodbye, sending her cute good morning texts. She was getting so keyed up she felt like jumping out of her skin most days.

           “What are you doing for your birthday, Tess?” Andrew asked from where he was sitting with Kaitlyn in their usual spot on the loveseat.

           “I don't know.” She shrugged. “I don’t have anything planned.”

           “Nah, we’ll do something.” Scott cut in, gently stroking his thumb back and forth across her skin like it was the most natural thing in the world. “We’ll definitely do something.”

           “We _have_ to do something.” Kaitlyn agreed. “You’re turning nineteen! Isn’t your birthday on a Saturday this year? We should all go to Canada’s Wonderland.”

           Everyone seemed to like that idea, and Tessa thought it would be fun to spend a day at the amusement park with her best friends, so she agreed. “Sounds like a good plan to me!”

 

* * *

 

 

           Saturday the seventeenth of May was beautifully warm and sunny – the perfect spring day. Tessa opened the windows of her dorm room wide to let in the fresh air, a smile spreading across her face as she got dressed for their day at Wonderland.

           She decided on her favorite lightweight white sweater, rolling the sleeves up to her elbows, a pair of dark jeans, and her favorite white sneakers. She had just finished pulling her hair up into a ponytail when her phone chirped with a text from Scott.

 

 **Scott:** Happy birthday, T! Prepare to have your cute little butt kicked at whack-a-mole today.

 

           She could feel her cheeks heating up as she read his simple message. He was rarely verbally flirtatious, but when he was it always made her feel all giddy.

 

 **Tessa:** Thanks, Scotty! And you WISH!

 

\--------------- 

 

            “Alright, so where are we starting?” They were standing in a loose semi-circle at the front of the park - Andrew, Kaitlyn, Tessa, Scott, Patrick, and Patrick's new girlfriend, Liz. Andrew was staring at them all, waiting for an answer.

            “Let’s hit some of the coasters first before it gets too busy.” Scott suggested, and Tessa took a second to appreciate how good he looked that morning. He was wearing black cargo shorts and a grey v-neck t-shirt, and somehow the simple outfit was working really well for him.

            They rode the Behemoth, Dragon Fire, Flight Deck, and Leviathan before Tessa had to beg for a break. All of the tossing and turning was making her a little motion sick. The group had naturally split up into pairs due to the nature of the two-by-two seating on the rides, and so she and Scott didn’t feel bad about heading off in the direction of the arcade games while the rest of them moved on to the next intense roller coaster.

            The instant Scott spotted the whack-a-mole game, a competitive grin spread across his face. “You ready to lose, Virtch?”

            “Kiss my ass, Moir.”

            Scott paid the attendant a couple bucks and they picked up the oversized mallets, both immediately falling into competition mode. As soon as the bell chimed to go they went _wild_. When the last mole went down and the game was over, Scott had won by one point.

            “Yes!” He shouted, dropping the mallet and raising his hands high in the air. “I’m the best.”

            “Shut up, it was one point.” Tessa complained good-naturedly. She could never be upset about losing when he looked so happy.

            “Admit I’m the best, Tess.” He taunted, reaching out to tickle her, and she laughed as she shoved him away.

            “Never! I demand a rematch – over there on the water cannons.” She pointed across from them.

            “Fine, but I’m just going to beat you at that too.” Scott shrugged, then took her hand in his as they walked over to the next game and Tessa’s heart gave a little irregular beat.

            He beat her at that one too, unnaturally good at aiming the stream of water at the metal clown's mouth, and Tessa pouted at him. “It’s my birthday.” She complained, but instead of apologizing, he just tickled her again – making her shriek and jump back.

            “Sorry you _had_ to lose on your birthday. But here, you can have the prize.” He handed her the weird blue duck that he’d won, and Tessa laughed.

            “Thanks. It’ll haunt my dreams.”

            “Hey, don’t be mean to Daffy.” Scott protested, trying to take the toy back. Tessa held it out of his reach.

            “You don’t get to name the duck. He’s mine.”

            Scott tried to reach for it again, and Tessa stepped back – holding it behind her.

            “You don’t get to keep it if you’re going to make fun of it.” He argued. 

            “It’s my present!”

            Giving up on getting the toy itself, Scott grabbed Tessa around the waist, taking her completely by surprise. She shrieked as he picked her up like she weighed nothing.

            “Okay, okay, you win! Put me down!” She laughed and struggled to get out of his hold.

            “Not until you say something nice about the duck. I worked very hard to win it for you.”

            Tessa could hear the laughter behind his teasing that he was struggling not to let break free.

            “You are ridiculous. _Fine_. It’s a very cute duck and we can name it Daffy.” She rolled her eyes as he set her down, keeping his arms wrapped around her waist as her feet hit the ground.

            “There. That wasn’t so hard, was it?” He was smiling so widely that his eyes were doing that little crinkly thing they did when he was truly happy, and Tessa answered him with a blinding smile of her own.

            “You two make a cute couple.” A little old lady eating a funnel cake smiled at them as she walked past, and Tessa blushed bright red.

            She expected Scott to pull away and say something to deny it, but instead his grip on her waist tightened infinitesimally and he said, “Thank you!” He paused for a second before calling out, “Actually, can you take a picture of us?”

            The woman nodded and walked back over and Scott handed her his new iPhone. “Take a couple shots.” He told her with a smile, and then wrapped his arm around Tessa.

            They took a couple side by side like that, and then Scott surprised her again by wrapping his arms around her from behind and tucking his chin into her neck. It tickled a little and she couldn’t help but laugh.

 

            That photo - a little bit grainy - of the two of them cuddling, her eyes closed in joyful laughter as Scott snuggled in close, would forever be one of her favorites.

 

           

           She was full of uncontainable energy the rest of the afternoon and Scott kept laughing at the way she was bouncing around everywhere they went – from the carousel to the Ferris wheel and in line for burgers.

           “Where do you think the others got to?” Scott asked as they shared an ice cream sundae.

           “No idea.” Tessa chuckled. “But I hope they’re having as good of a time as we are. I’m so glad Kaitlyn suggested this.”

           “I’m glad you’re having a good birthday, kiddo.” He smiled warmly at her, and Tessa was happy to discover that the nickname no longer dredged up old feelings of heartbreak. “They’re performing The Little Mermaid tonight over at the theatre stage here. Do you want to go watch?”

           “Yeah. My feet could use a break from walking.”

 

           They settled into their seats as the show began. The singers were actually not half-bad, considering it was an amusement park production, but Tessa wasn’t very interested in the show. She was more interested in Scott’s hand, resting lightly on his thigh, and working up the nerve to take it in hers.

           They had held hands a bunch of times, including earlier that day, but it had always been him reaching for her – not the other way around. She hadn’t felt confident enough to initiate it, but _now_ , in that moment, she felt like it was time to make a move. Taking a deep breath, she reached out and looped her fingers through his.

           Scott didn’t hesitate to tighten the hold, looking at her with a searching gaze. Tessa hoped that he found the answer he sought in her expression, and after a moment when his face softened and the corners of his lips tilted up, she was certain that he had.

 

           When the play ended the sun was falling behind the horizon, and they walked slowly hand-in-hand down the path, not really heading anywhere in particular.

           They came across an empty little rest area, surrounded by big trees and rose bushes, and Scott pulled her into it. Before she had a chance to ask what he was doing, he took both of her hands in his and began speaking.

           “Tess, I have to tell you something.”

           He looked so serious that for a second she thought it might be bad news. “What is it?”

           He took a deep breath and began speaking rapidly. “You’re my best friend. I love you. I’m _in_ love with you. And if you don’t feel the same, that’s alright – I’m happy just being your friend, but I couldn’t go on any longer without telling you how I felt.” He was holding onto her fingers so tightly they were turning blue, but Tessa didn’t notice. She was too caught up in the euphoria spreading through her body.

           “You’ve always been my best friend.” She could feel her eyes growing misty. “And I love you, too.”

           “Oh thank god.” He let out a sigh of relief, and Tessa chuckled.

           He gulped, suddenly nervous again. “Just… double-checking. You are _in_ love with me, right? As more than friends?”

          Tessa swatted his arm gently. “Yes, you idiot. Have been for a very long time.”

           He grinned, “Me too.” Pulling her in close, his voice dropped to a husky whisper. “Can I kiss you now?”

           “Please do.”

           He pressed his mouth against hers, and it was like every daydream Tessa had had for years and somehow nothing like them at all. Sometimes she imagined their first kiss would be soft and gentle – just a light touch of their lips before pulling away – and sometimes at night she would imagine it hard and passionate, preferably against some sort of hard surface. But the real thing was infinitely better.

           His hand slid into her hair, mouth eager against hers – gentle and firm at the same time – and she pressed herself right up against him, pleased when she heard him let out a quiet moan. He used his other arm to pull her in closer, and Tessa could feel herself spiraling out of control. It wasn't enough - she wanted  _more_. 

           Just then the sounds of crying children broke the bubble, and Tessa realized that this was a rest area for _parents_ and she and Scott were currently in the way of a stressed out dad taking a break with his kids. They muttered their apologies and walked away, but Scott kept his arm tight around her waist – and he was grinning from ear to ear.

           “Do you think you could convince Patrick to stay somewhere else tonight?” Tessa asked, tone light and airy, despite her stomach being full of butterflies. Scott tripped and looked at her in shock and barely hidden desire.

           “Uh… probably. Did you … um… want to come over?”

            She thought it was cute how he was blushing and looking so nervous and eager. She was nervous too, but couldn’t stand to wait any longer. She knew what she wanted, and now that they were on the same page emotionally she was ready to move forward. _Tonight_ if possible.

           “Do you _want_ me to come over?” She gave him a cheeky smile, laughing when he hurried to reply.

           “God yes. Please.”

           “Then you’d better text Patrick.”

            Whatever Patrick said in reply made Scott roll his eyes and shove his phone back into his pocket.

            “Everything okay?”

            “Oh yeah. Patrick’s staying at Liz’s tonight. I guess they had a good day too.” He joked. 

            Tessa looked at him curiously, but didn’t push it. She pulled out her own phone to let Kaitlyn know not to wait up.

 

            **Tessa:** Won’t be home tonight. Staying at Scott’s.

 

            **Kaitlyn:** I hope you mean having sex, but by this point I know you probably just mean staying over platonically. :(

 

            **Tessa:** ;)

 

            **Kaitlyn:** TESSA ARE YOU SERIOUS!?

 

            **Tessa:** See you tomorrow.

 

            She flipped her phone closed with a satisfied smile. Enjoying the opportunity to tease Kaitlyn after all these months.  

 

\----------------

 

            They stood awkwardly inside his dorm room, the silence stretching on, and Tessa wasn’t sure how to break it.

            “Can I, uh, get you anything?” Scott asked nervously, and Tessa was suddenly overwhelmed with the desire to laugh.

            “Oh my god, Scott. Just kiss me.”

            Not needing to be told twice, his lips descended on hers. She let him guide her over to the bed, but then turned around at the last second and pushed him so that he was sitting down. Before she could chicken out, she grabbed the hem of her sweater and pulled it over her head, leaving her in a simple white bra.

            She almost regretted not wearing something fancier, but Scott’s mouth had gone slack and his eyes were dilated so wide they were almost black, so he must not mind too much.

            Reaching behind her back, she undid the clasp and let the bra fall slowly to the floor.

            “God, Tess, you're perfect.” Scott choked out, before reaching for her waist and pulling her into his lap. His lips working their way down her chest before wrapping around one of her nipples and she arched into the sudden heat with a wordless cry, loving the way his other hand slid softly up her ribcage to cup her other breast. Her hands buried themselves in his hair, tugging at it as she started to grind down against him, but was encumbered by her jeans. “Hang on. Pants – off.”

            Scott nodded emphatically, practically tearing his shirt in his haste to get it off, and Tessa was momentarily distracted by the sight of him shirtless until he stood up and let his shorts fall to the floor, leaving him in nothing but his boxers.

            She was too distracted by the sight in front of her to continue, so Scott took the lead - grabbing her by the hips and leading her back onto the bed, pulling her jeans off himself.  Once he’d thrown them carelessly somewhere behind him, he fell to his knees, pulling her to the edge of the mattress.

            Tessa realized his intentions and started to sit up. “Scott you don’t have to-“

            He gave her a heated look, and Tessa’s mouth snapped closed. No one had ever done this for her before, but if Scott wanted to, there was no way she was going to stop him. And it was clear from his expression that he wanted to.

            He slowly pulled her underwear down her legs, leaving her completely naked now. She could feel her nervousness building, but then she felt him place a soft kiss to the inside of her thigh and it was so sweet and tender it calmed her down immediately.

            “If I do something you don't like, tell me.”

            She closed her eyes and let herself get lost in the feeling of his lips running up and down the inside of her thighs, moaning when he sucked a mark into her hipbone. Just as she was getting used to having him down there, his tongue swiped up her center and she cried out, hips arching off the bed.

            Scott laughed, nipping at her skin, moving one arm up to hold her hips down and diving back in. It felt so much better than anything she had ever imagined. Her body felt like it was on fire – the pleasure was overwhelming. He paid careful attention to her responses to learn the right ways to use his mouth to bring her to ecstasy, and just as she was about to fall he reached out and took her hand, lacing their fingers together.

            With one last suck on her clit she was coming – crying out wordlessly, back bowing off of the bed.

            She came back to awareness as Scott was climbing up her body, peppering it with kisses as he went.

            He leaned back in, kissing her slow and sweet, and Tessa let her hands trail down his back, scratching lightly along his shoulder blades and down to the small of his back. 

            “I couldn’t stop thinking about this.” He pulled back just far enough to trail kisses under her jaw. “When we were in bed together in that awful inn in December, and every day since. It’s been so hard to resist kissing you.”

            “Well then stop trying.” Tessa teased, tickling his ribcage so that he squirmed a little above her. 

            “I’ll spend every day kissing you, if you let me.”

            He was such a sap, and Tessa _loved_ it. She kissed him for a little while, until it became clear the Scott couldn’t wait much longer. He began slowly grinding against her, almost mindlessly, and Tessa pulled back.

            “You have a condom right?”

            “Yeah. I bought some a couple weeks ago in case I ever worked up the nerve to tell you how I felt.” He answered her and she smiled at him.

            “You should probably put it on.” She whispered, and he jumped up to retrieve one from his nightstand while she repositioned herself higher on the bed.

            Scott looked at her for a long moment, eyes roaming her naked body. “This is like something out of one of my dreams.”

            Tessa smiled brilliantly at him and held out her hand. He dropped his boxers and took it as he crawled over her again. “Ready?” He asked breathlessly, and she nodded.

            He slid in slowly, the familiar stretch sending pleasant shivers up her spine. They tried to keep kissing as he began thrusting, but soon it became too hard to do that and breathe at the same time and they ended up just barely touching lips, mouths hanging open as they lost themselves in each other.

            He held out as long as he could, reaching down to touch her so that she could come again before he did. When she finally reached her peak, he fell with her with a violent shudder, burying his face into the crook of her neck.

            Tessa held onto him while his breathing evened  out, enjoying the way it felt to have him tucked in close - lying on top of her. Finally after a moment he pushed himself up with his arms.

            “Condom. I’ll be right back.” He apologized, standing up and heading to the bathroom. Tessa stood and rummaged around in his dresser for something to wear, laughing when she noticed her pants hanging off the top of his bookshelf. She pulled out an old Moir’s Skate Shop t-shirt that was soft and worn and put it on before she could second-guess her choice.

            When Scott came back out he stared at her, eyes going wide.

            “I borrowed this to sleep in. I hope it’s okay.”

            “It’s more than okay.” He told her, voice sounding a little strangled and his eyes repeatedly dropping to stare at where her legs disappeared into the hem of the shirt.

            He put his boxers back on and they climbed back into bed together. He immediately pulled her in close so that her head was resting on his shoulder. 

            Tessa let her own hand run across his chest, free to explore in the way she’d always wanted. He hummed in contentment, eyes beginning to drift closed.

            “Goodnight, Scott.” She whispered, pressing a kiss to his skin.

            “G’night, Tess. Love you.” He mumbled back, and somehow the casual way he said it – half asleep, voice thick and husky after their lovemaking, was even better than when he’d told her earlier.

            “I love you, too.”        


	9. Chapter 8: Everybody Knows

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading my story and taking the time to leave kudos and comments. I love you all!
> 
> I hope you enjoy this last chapter. :)

**Tessa:** When do you get in?

 

            **Scott:** Not until 9.

 

            Scott had always liked his summer hockey and team building camp. It was an entire month of hanging out with his friends, practicing the sport that he loved, and just generally having a good time. But this year he had spent each day of it counting down the hours until he was reunited with his girlfriend.

            His _girlfriend_. Sometimes he had to pinch himself just to make sure it was all real – Tessa had come back into his life, she wanted him, and she loved him.

           The two years that they had seen separated had been a nightmare – a time period that Scott privately referred to as his dark years. Sure, he had kept his grades up and performed well at each hockey game – making a name for himself in the process – but all of his spare time had been devoted to drinking and getting laid. His family still held a bit of a grudge for hardly ever going home to visit the past two years.

            In an attempt to create some structure, he had tried having a girlfriend. Jessica had been great, but he was so on and off with her - stringing her along - that he still felt bad about the emotional whiplash she must have gotten from him. They tried to make it work for almost an entire school year, before they both realized they weren’t right for each other.

            Nothing changed until he walked into his GE history course, hungover and irritable, and saw a familiar face sitting across the room. Hope had filled a place in his chest that had been vacant for a long time. 

 

            Having Tessa back in his life, only to watch her date someone else, had been its own kind of hell, but it was still better than not having her at all. His teammates had given him shit for starting to refuse every girl that hit on him, but he knew what he wanted – there was no point in wasting time with anyone else. Not when it was Tessa he’d be thinking about. It wouldn’t have been fair to those girls.

            So he had learned to be patient, focused on being her friend, and happy to be so – even if friendship was all she ever wanted. But then she had told him she loved him too, and everything changed. Being with Tessa was even better than he’d ever imagined. The way her eyes lit up every time she saw him, the special smile she reserved just for him, the way her hands fit perfectly in his – Scott had never been so happy in his life.

 

             But then, only a few weeks into their relationship, he had to be gone for an entire month at fucking hockey camp, and although they had talked on the phone every day, it hadn’t come anywhere close to seeing her in person and holding her in his arms. He missed the smell of her strawberry shampoo – which had drenched his bed sheets by the time school ended. He was half hard just thinking about it as he sat on the team bus headed back to Toronto.

 

 **Scott:** I can’t wait to kiss you.

 

 **Tessa:** Me too. :)

 

 **Scott:** Come over tonight?

 

 **Tessa:** I can’t. Have to help get things ready for tomorrow.

 

             Both of their families were heading to the cabin on Lake Huron together for a couple weeks over the Canada Day holiday, and although that meant seeing Tess 24/7, it was going to be pure torture.

             They had decided not to tell their families that they were dating yet – mostly Tessa had decided – because their relationship was still so new and if they broke up she was worried it could have devastating ripple effects on their close-knit relatives. Scott was letting Tessa take the lead – willing to keep quiet until he had proved to her that he was in it for the long haul.

             God – how that would have scared him to think about only a year ago, but now it was all that he wanted.

 

             When he finally dragged his feet across his parent’s threshold that night, he was immediately greeted by his boisterous family – who all wanted to ask a million questions about the school year and how hockey camp was and if he was seeing anyone (his mom asked that particular question, and Scott was certain he had blushed as he told her _no_ ).

             His dad sat him down as soon as he could to talk hockey and “how does the team look this year?” and had the coach mentioned anything about NHL scouts – but Scott, who normally enjoyed play-by-play rundowns with his dad, couldn’t quite pay attention because the love of his life was currently a few miles south and it was killing him how much he wanted to be with her.

             After his family finally let him say goodnight and crawl into bed, it was long after midnight. But Scott couldn’t resist the temptation to call Tessa, even though he knew she was probably sleeping.

             She answered on the third ring – her voice breathy in a way that instantly caught Scott’s attention.

             “Hey, Scotty, what’s up?”

             “Not much. Just missing you. What are you doing awake?”

             “Um…” She replied, and the way she said it Scott just _knew_ she was blushing. A wicked smirk spread across his face and he reached down to palm himself through his boxers.

             “What are you wearing?” It was such a cliché line, but he couldn’t help asking it – letting his voice drop low – keeping quiet in case one of his brothers, or – god forbid – his mom walked by his door.

             Tessa let out a little laugh, caught in the act. “Nothing.” She confessed, and picturing her like that sent a jolt straight to Scott’s groin.

             The most delightful discovery about Tessa in the last month was how sexual she could be – a secret that no one would suspect lay under her sweet exterior.

             “Are you touching yourself, Tess?”

             “Yes.” She whispered, a little whimper escaping her throat.

             “What are you thinking about?” Scott knew the answer, but he wanted to hear her say it anyway. _Needed_ to hear her say it.

            “You. Always you.”

             He groaned and stripped off his boxers, gripping himself more firmly. “What about me?”

             She hesitated and then said, “Your mouth. Between my legs.”

             “Fuck, Tess.” Scott let out a groan, pumping himself and drawing out the sensation. “I wish I was there right now. I’d bury my mouth in you – fuck you so good with my tongue. Make you come so hard all over me.”

              Scott was a talker, he always had been, and when they first started sleeping together he was worried that it would freak her out, but one night he hadn’t been able to stop himself and she had _loved_ it. He could hear her moaning quietly, and his own release was imminent. “Come on, baby.”

             “Scott.” She whimpered. “So close.”

             “Love it when you say my name like that. Come now, Tess. Let go.”

             She went quiet, and Scott knew that meant her mouth had fallen open in a silent cry, accompanied by a little moan at the end. It was enough, and he spilled himself all over his stomach.

             When he came back down, he could hear her still breathing heavily through the phone. “I miss you so much, T. I can’t wait to do that again in person. I’m gonna spend hours worshipping you.”

             She let out a little affectionate laugh. “When? Before or after family dinner at the cabin?”

              Scott groaned. “We will find a way, I swear to God.”

             “Is that a promise?” She asked coyly, and the teasing in her voice had him growing hard again .

             “Absolutely.”

 

* * *

  

             The next morning they loaded up the family van with enough supplies to last a month – his mom practically bringing her entire kitchen – and crowded inside to head north. Road trips had been the highlight of Scott’s summers when he was a kid, but now that he and his brothers were all grown it made for a squashed back seat.

             His dad popped in a CD of classic 80’s rock and soon they were all singing along. A Moir family choir. Scott was enjoying it, but couldn’t help tapping his fingers on his thigh – anxious to get to their destination.  

             “Are you nervous or something?” Charlie asked, sandwiched in the seat between him and Danny.

             “What? No.” Scott stilled the motion of his hand, shoving it under his leg instead.

             “Is it because Tessa will be there? I know you haven’t seen her in a while.” Danny chimed in, never resisting an opportunity to tease his little brother.

             “Actually, I see her quite a bit around campus. We had a class together last semester.” Scott tried to act casual, but he had a feeling Danny could sense something was off. He was looking at him like he was a particularly difficult equation.

             “Oh are you two friends again?” His mom turned around from the front seat, a wide smile on her face. Scott would accuse her of eavesdropping, except they were in a car so having a private conversation was impossible. “I’m so glad. It wasn’t right, all those years not talking.”

              Scott rolled his eyes good-naturedly. His mom had made no secret of her love of Tessa and had been berating him for years about why he had stopped spending time with her.

             “Turns out it was just a misunderstanding, Mom. It’s all good now.”

             Danny shifted around in his seat, forcing Scott and Charlie to make more room for him, “It’ll be fun to see her again. I wonder what she looks like, now that she’s all grown up. I bet she’s gorgeous.”

             Catching onto his brother’s game, Charlie joined in. “Definitely. She probably has all the boys chasing her at school.”

             And Scott knew that his brothers didn’t mean anything by it. After a lifetime spent as a little brother, he knew when they were baiting him. But it still made his blood boil a little bit to hear them talk about Tess like that. As he focused on relaxing and not giving his brothers the satisfaction of eliciting a reaction, Scott realized that maybe keeping his feelings hidden for the next few weeks was going to be harder than he thought.

 

* * *

 

 

             Torture. That’s what it was. Pure, blissful, torture. The Virtues were already at the cabin by the time Scott’s family had arrived, and Jordan and Tessa had immediately gone down to the lake to swim and enjoy the warm sunshine. Not wasting any time, Scott and his brothers had changed into their swimsuits and gone out to join them.

             Now Scott couldn’t seem to take his eyes off of Tessa. She had greeted him casually, like a friend, and even though Scott had been expecting it - it still hurt not being able to pull her into his arms and kiss her like he wanted. She looked amazing in her red bikini – the color complimenting her pale skin and dark hair beautifully – and the way she was laughing with Jordan and Charlie in the afternoon sun made her positively radiant.

            “Little Tutu sure is all grown up, eh?” Danny said from where he was fixing up the rope swing.

            “Huh?” Was Scott’s eloquent reply as he dragged his eyes away from his girlfriend to his brother – who was smirking at him.

            “She fills out a swimsuit better than ever before.”

            Scott glared at him, knowing that he was purposely trying to rile him up, but unable to resist taking the bait this time. “Don’t talk about her like that.”

            Danny held up his arms defensively. “I’m just saying. Some guy is going to scoop her up _fast_ , if no one has already. Do you know if she has a boyfriend?”

            “She doesn’t.” Scott said, his tone sharper than he’d intended. “Can we just… focus on the swing here?” He softened his voice and started putting up the rope swing and tying a secure knot, studiously avoiding his brother’s eyes. Danny snorted and shook his head.

            “Sure, little bro. Whatever you want.”

           

            Eventually they got the swing working again and were taking turns using it to swing into the water. Tessa had come to stand by Scott, keeping a respectable distance between them at first which he rapidly closed. He subtly pulled her back to stand a little behind their siblings, out of eyeshot, so that he could finally touch her – unable to resist rubbing his hand up and down her naked spine, keeping his hand on the small of her back even when she bent down to pull a leaf off of her foot.

            Andrew had teased him back at school that he had a ten second rule – as in, he could only go ten seconds without touching Tessa – and Scott was beginning to think he was right.

            “What are you doing?” She leaned over to whisper, keeping her eyes fixed on their siblings and her lips barely moving as she waited her turn for the swing.

            “Thirty-one days, Tess. That’s how long it’s been.” He murmured back, scratching his nails lightly along the small of her back, pleased when she shivered in response.

            “And it’s going to be longer.” She shook her head at him, and Scott could see the regret in her eyes. “We can’t do anything here with our families around.”

            “I made a promise, didn’t I?” He squeezed her hip, sliding his hand up her ribcage and grazing the side of her breast before pulling away.

            “If you can find a way not to get caught, let me know.” She whispered, before stepping out of reach and striking up a conversation with Danny.

            He watched her go, a smile spreading across his face. “Challenge accepted.”

           

 

            Scott had formulated a plan of attack. First, he needed to stoke the fire in Tessa until she wanted him so badly she forgot about where they were. Second, find a way to split up from the group. Third, make her come at _least_ twice, three times if possible.

            The first part of the plan was easy. Stroking her back when he walked past, being a little more physical than necessary during beach volleyball, sharing a ski-do with her – wrapping his body around hers under the guise of “water safety” as they rode around the lake. During dinner he grew bolder and reached under the table at one point to stroke her bare knee – nearly making her drop her fork in surprise. The flash of heat in her eyes told him it was time to move on to step two.

            It was the most difficult part of his plan. She was sharing a room with Jordan and he was sharing with his brothers – so that severely limited their options. Salvation came in the form of Kate announcing that she had forgotten to bring the supplies for s’mores – and asking Tessa and Scott if they minded running into town to get some.

           

            “Bless your mom.” Scott said as he and Tessa made out in the backseat of the van. They had parked on one of the dirt side roads on their way to the store.

            “Can you please not talk about my _mom_ while we’re doing this?” Tessa joked as she stripped him of his shirt.

            “I’m just saying. Would it be weird if I got her flowers and a thank you card?”

            Tessa pulled a funny face. “What would you write? ‘Dear Kate, thanks for giving me a chance to bang your daughter – you’re a real pal. Scott.’”

            He laughed and thrust against her - making her whimper - before looking at her with a goofy grin. “Definitely.”

 

* * *

          

            Once the initial pent up emotion and desire had been released, Scott found it easier to be around Tessa and keep his feelings a secret. The week following their tryst in the woods was filled with fun family outings, sunburns, campfires, and movie nights.

 

            The movie that night was Strange Brew, and everyone had settled into their respective seats while Joe fiddled with the DVD player. Scott and Tessa were sitting on the end of each couch, kitty-corner from each other, arms hanging off the side – just out of reach. Scott enjoyed grazing her fingers with his when no one was looking. Smiling into his soda glass every time she shot him a warning glance.

            “Tess, there’s a new guy interning at my office – super cute, blonde hair, tall – you’d love him. I want to set you up on a date.” Jordan was sitting on the floor in front of the couch and had turned around to look up at her sister.

            Scott’s hand gripped his glass so hard he thought it might shatter. He looked over at Tessa, who was looking down at her shoes.

            “Oh, um… I don’t think so. Thanks, though.”

            “It’s been _months_ since your break-up. Why not? You’re not seeing anyone else, are you?”

            Scott, who had always liked Jordan a lot, suddenly really disliked her in that moment. _Me! She’s dating me!_ He wanted to yell. Scream it to the world. Instead he was forced to wait for Tessa’s reply.

            “… No. But I’m not interested in seeing anyone else.”

            Scott picked up on her careful wording immediately. Her tone implied that she was joking with Jordan, but to him that simple sentence meant the world.

 

            Later that night, after everyone had gone to bed, Scott got up to use the bathroom – nothing bothering to turn on any lights as he walked, which of course meant he slammed into a solid object in front of the bathroom door.

            “Oh! Sorry!”

            “Sorry!”

            “Tess?” Scott perked up.

            “Shhh!” She looked around, then surprised him by grabbing him by the shirt and pulled him in for a kiss. He had to be honest, all of this sneaking around was kind of a turn on - amping up the anticipation.    

            He got lost in kissing her, loving the way she felt and moved. Moving his lips down her throat, he tugged her pajama shirt down so that he could suck a hickey into her collar bone, dark against her pale skin.

            “How am I going to hide that tomorrow?” She asked, one perfect eyebrow arching up at him.

            “Don’t.” Scott shrugged. He was quite a possessive bastard, it seemed, and if she wouldn’t let him proclaim his love to the world then he would have to mark her in other ways.

            She sighed, running her fingers through his hair so softly it pulled at something deep inside his heart. “You know I’m not actually going on that blind date, right?”

            “I know.” He mumbled, lips moving against her skin before gliding up to make another mark underneath her ear. She tilted her head, letting him do whatever he wanted.

            “You’re the one that I want.” She half whispered/half sang, and Scott laughed – the tightness in his chest from earlier that he'd tried to ignore finally releasing.

            “The one you need?” He looked up at her, his heart growing a couple sizes at the tender look in her eyes. Her fingernails scratched his scalp softly and his eyelids fluttered closed.

            “Oh yes indeed.”

  

* * *

 

 

            In retrospect, it was a miracle they made it as long as they did without getting caught.

            

            “Scott we can’t!” Tessa laughed, pretending to resist even though she was pulling his waist in the direction of the pantry.

            “Right. Now. Tess.” He continued peppering kisses along her cheeks and jawline, before moving to nip at the spot under her ear that he loved and knew made her knees weak.

            “Ugh. Fine. But we have to be quick.” She gave in easily, grinning at him like a naughty schoolgirl.

            “You can’t rush perfection.” He winked at her, tugging her tank-top off once they were safely ensconced inside the pantry with the door closed behind them.

            “I appreciate the confidence, but you’ll have to rush – before anyone notices that we’re gone.”

            Scott kissed her then, hard and searing, bringing his hands up to her bare breasts. She hadn’t worn a bra all day - just to torture him - and it had worked. He’d been driven to distraction. He pinched her nipples – harder than normal – as punishment, pleased when she let out a little whimper, biting her bottom lip as he did it again.

            Never one to be outdone, Tessa’s hands went to his pants, undoing the zipper and slipping her hand inside to grip him, stroking him firmly and nearly making his knees buckle.

            “Two can play at that game, Virtch.” He returned the favor, slipping his hand in her shorts and running a finger through her folds, groaning when he discovered just how wet she was.

            “I don’t want to play right now. Just make me come, Scott.” Tessa whimpered, spreading her legs wider for him.

            He had to kiss her then, all hot and heavy – letting his tongue stroke hers every once in a while in a thrusting motion that mirrored what he was doing between her legs, two of his fingers moving easily inside her. His other hand moved to her ponytail, gripping it and the back of her neck in one motion and holding on tight.

            The door behind them opened, flooding the pantry with light, and Jordan’s voice rang out, “Oh. My. God. _I knew it!_ ” She leaned back, turning her head to yell towards the living room, “You guys all owe me twenty bucks! EACH!”

            “And you two,” She said accusingly without looking at them again, “Owe me therapy because that image is burned on my retinas. Our _food_ is in there!”

            “Sorry.” Scott grumbled, more disappointed at being interrupted than embarrassed at being caught, although part of him was worried about Tessa and how she was feeling in that moment. He did his pants back up and then bent over to retrieve her shirt, standing in front of her to give her some privacy while she put it back on.

            “We’ll be right out. Sorry, Jordan.” Tessa said in a small voice that made Scott’s heart skip a beat. Once Jordan had made another noise of disgust and walked away, she finally looked him in the eye.

            “Are you okay?” He caressed her cheek, satisfied that she wasn’t too upset when she leaned into his touch.

            “Yeah. Not _exactly_ how I planned on telling them.” She let out an embarrassed laugh. “But we haven’t exactly been discreet.”

            Scott chuckled and dropped his hand to lace their fingers together. “It’s not your fault. I’m just irresistible.” He winked and she rolled her eyes. “You ready to go back out there?”      

            “Ready as I’ll ever be.”

 

            They walked back into the living room hand-in-hand. Scott’s hair was completely disheveled from Tessa’s hands, and her own ponytail hadn’t fared much better. It was definitely obvious what they’d been doing.

            They were met with wolf-whistles from his brothers and a muttered “ _Finally”_ from Jordan, while their parents just looked at them in confusion.

            “What are we missing here?” Kate asked, looking back and forth between them, eyes getting repeatedly stuck on their joined hands.

            “Scott and Tess are together now, Mom.” Jordan explained like it was the most commonplace thing in the world.

            "Oh. I kind of wondered. It's nice to have confirmation." Kate smiled at them.

            "You did?" Tessa asked her mother in surprise. 

            "Uh, T, not to burst your bubble or anything, but you guys were kind of obvious. We had a bet going on how long it would take for somebody to catch you." Charlie spoke up, handing a twenty dollar bill over to Jordan, who pocketed it with a triumphant grin.

            "Oh my god." Tessa brought her hand up to palm her face in embarrassment, and Scott could feel his own cheeks turn pink. They hadn't been as clever as they thought. 

            “Well I, for one, am thrilled! I always hoped this would happen someday.” Alma clasped her hands together. "This is wonderful!”

            “Wonderful for Scott. Tess could definitely to better.” Danny joked and Scott thumped him on the back of the head.

            “I don’t think so. I think he’s the best choice for me.” Tessa spoke confidently, and Scott knew he was grinning like a fool, but he couldn’t take his eyes off her.

            “Oh god. Just sit down, lovebirds, so we can watch the movie.” Jordan complained, but then smiled softly at Tess, and Scott knew that she was happy for them.

            He sat back down on the sofa, this time pulling Tessa onto his lap so that he could rest his head in the gap between her neck and shoulder – his favorite place. “For the record, you’re the best choice for me, too.” He whispered so that only she could hear, and when she kissed him it felt like coming home.


End file.
